Thursday, October 4, 2012

☺ Bianca's "Recovery" Tips to Happiness ☺



One day I had hoped to write a mini auto-biography of all the things I went through in my life. I wanted my story to be an example to others to show that it doesn't matter what has happened in your life, you can always make a recovery and be Happy. But, I started to write this story, and it just made me sad. It wasn't the inspiring story that I felt that I would be writing. Understandably, I don't like dwelling on the past. It's not that I want to just forget it ever happened, but I no longer dwell on it and focus on the negatives. I am so incredibly grateful for everything that has happened to me, it all made me who I am today and I love love love who I am today. I am very very grateful for my past and that was a huge step in recovering to happiness. 
I didn't always feel this way about my past, not by a long shot. I will never write an autobiography. There is no point in retelling another depressing story. That doesn't make others feel good. I understand that it's inspiring to know that anyone can be happy, but I see the people who read all these depressing life stories because it's "inspiring" to hear other people's hard lives and know that they recovered, and those people are not happy people. If you spend so much of your time reading about other people's sad lives then it's not exactly going to fill you with a sense of happiness. Hope, maybe. But hope is nothing if you don't make changes in your life and shift your attention onto the positive. This is why I will never write an autobiography. 
I will however tell you this, to give you an understanding of where I came from, who I was then, and who I am now. 
I was depressed for years, suicidal, and used some negative outlets to "cope," again, the details and reasons to that depression I'm not diving into. I wallowed in that depression for years. I just didn't have the motivation to pick myself out of it and I didn't have the resources or inspiration to push me out either. This is why I write this blog, this is why I try to reach as many people as possible, to help others feel inspired and take that first step to better their lives. 
I also hated my body, I hated everything about myself. I thought no one liked me, I had no friends, I had no self-worth. My life was a miserable mess. 
*big deep breath*
Finally, I got my first push. At first they were little whispers of songs or words I'd hear, but eventually the charge to change became more burning inside of me and I finally really took the steps to better myself and my life. I took charge to Be Happy. The climb was a bit slow, I think it is for many of us when we don't really know what we're doing, we just know that we Want to feel better. 
My journey towards happiness would have been much faster and smoother if I'd had a blog to read like this, if I'd sought out positive sources sooner and if I'd one all the things I'm about to mention sooner.
Today, I love myself. I love my life. I am the happiest, most optimistic, positive little butterfly you'll ever encounter. Life still has ups and downs, life always will, but when the downs come along I know how to roll with them, to use them, to learn something from, and get back on that upbeat happy path. 

This post is to share with you some of the things that really helped me on my path--things that I wish I'd found sooner. All of the following points I am going to go over were essential and absolutely necessary on my healing path, which is why I am sharing them with you. 

Okay, so without further ado, Bianca's "Recovery" Resources…  


Books, Movies, and Reads: 

Books keep our minds fresh and I recommend reading often. A lot of the information you'll read in "self-help" type books will be similar, just told in different ways. Read them all. Hearing something over and over again is Good--when this information is positive and helpful-- because it will engrave new ideas into your head and create new brain patterns and habits. Changing your attitude and life takes time and repetition of these new concepts. So surround yourself with positive helpful information. 

"Way of the Peaceful Warrior" by Dan Millman. This book Changed my life in every way possible. It was the book that made the light go on. The book that changed everything. The book that taught me all of my valuable lessons to improve my life and my attitude. 

"The Secret" by Rhonda Byrne. I only read this book about a year ago, but I think it would have been very useful early on! The Law of Attraction is everything and it has definitely given me that final boost in all aspects of my life. It is a Must read! 

"The Tao of Pooh" by Benjamin Hoff. Fantastic! A simple quick and fun read that teaches you the principles of Taoism through Winnie the Pooh characters. What's not to love? Again, very useful in teaching you the best ways to live life, to use whatever comes your way, and to have the right attitude. 
"The Te of Piglet" a sort of "sequel" but with different valuable information. 

"The Celestine Prophecy" by James Redfield. This was actually the first "spiritual" "self-improvement" book that I read. It's a fantastic read and very useful in understanding energies, human behaviours and patterns. There is a three-book series, but this was the most valuable one to me. 

Here are a couple other wonderful books that I've read that I found useful that weren't necessarily the ones that "changed my life" but certainly fantastic reads that helped along the way:
"The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle 
"Friendship with God" by Neale Donald Walsch

"What the Bleep do we know?" This movie is fantastic, amazing, and, again, one of those essential must-watch items. It teaches us why we do certain things, behave certain ways, and fall back into old habits. The more we know the more we can have an understanding of ourselves and therefor change ourselves. Watch it immediately! 

Aside from these, I surround my life with other positive reads, like lots of positive blog posts (which is why I write this blog!), positive phrases and quotes. My Facebook, tumblr, and Pinterest are Filled to the brim with positivity, I make sure I'm around it all the time and widdle away any negatives that remain. 


Changed my Diet: Cutting out foods I was allergic to, processed foods, refined sugars (this is a Huge one!), and general foods that make you feel "blah." This is essential and so many people miss this step! If you want to feel good, if you want your brain to heal, then give it energy and food it can actually use! 

Exercise! I tried a few times but never really gave exercise a chance because I didn't feel like it helped. However, when my life took it's biggest boosts in overall happiness, I also started to exercise regularly. Almost every day for half an hour. But any kind of regular exercise will help. I promise. 

Affirmations! I wrote down practically every single day (and still do) what I wanted in life, what I was grateful for, why I loved myself, and why I loved life. I didn't even know about the Law of Attraction at the time, but this practice helps tremendously! It is Essential! It's a daily refresher for your brain, and part of changing your life to being Happy and recovering is to break on brain habits and form new ones. Writing is the key to changing those brain patterns. 

Councillor Sessions. If I had never gone to a councillor I am quite convinced that I would not be where I am today. My problems, like most, were deep routed from past experiences and traumas. In order for me to get through those I had to see this councillor. I did what was called an "EMDR" session which allowed me to revisit my past and gain a better understanding and peace of mind over things that happened. I was able to let it go. I highly recommend seeing a councillor and, if you can, getting an EMDR session done. I felt like I was walking on clouds after that session, no joke! 

Took 5-HTP. My endorphins were low due to years of being depressed. It happens to anyone who's depressed. I absolutely 100% disagree with medical anti-depressants. However, I do believe in natural remedies that can help you out. Things like 5-HTP and St John's Wort are amazing for bringing your endorphin levels back to a healthy level. I took 5-HTP for several years (apparently you're not supposed to take it for quite that long *oops*) and eventually, when I was ready, weened myself off. It was one of those things that I kind of felt didn't help because it was very subtle, but whenever I'd stop taking them all of a sudden I would become so easily overwhelmed and stressed out. So, remember, sometimes things may seem subtle, but they actually do help tremendously. St John's Wort I also took a few times but generally couldn't because it interferes with birth control pills. 

Getting off Birth Control Pills. This was another one of those things that was essential to my healing. I don't care what anyone says, putting unnatural hormones into your body can Not be healthy for you. It messes up with your body's natural ability to do anything. They made me crazy. I tried so many different ones too. At first I didn't think they affected me negatively, but I was already depressed and emotional, so how was I supposed to tell? Going off them was one of the best steps I took. My hormones are still trying to mellow out, even after 4 years, but even so I feel tremendously better and aligned with myself.  


Positive Environment: Spending too much time with the wrong people is incredibly damaging. I had to remove certain people from my life, limit contact with others, and try to surround myself with positive like-minded people. People change, friends change, family changes. Adapt and make your world positive. You don't have to be mean, you just have to do what's right for you and beneficial to your healing environment. I had some amazing people around me that were huge sources of inspiration so I highly recommend spending as much time as possible with these people who really benefit you. 

Picking up a Positive Mental Attitude: Picking up the attitude of being Positive in the face of anything and everything seriously helped with all the bumps that came along. But I wasn't able to fully pick up this attitude until I did all of the points above. Do your best, it gets easier and more natural the longer you have this attitude. 

These are the biggest most important changes I made in my life. Like I already said, these were all essential to my healing. And now I can look back and be so grateful for my past, my present, and anything that comes my way. All the inspirational posts I write on this blog are part of that learning and healing process that I took, the lessons that were very valuable and healing in my recovery. I write this blog to pass on those lessons to you, to help you on your own path, and to inspire you to make positive changes. 
Remember to never get discouraged, to always stay hopeful, to do your best, and try to smile and focus on good things every single day. Work on your self every single day. Every day gets easier. Even if you experience the downs among the ups, you are still generally heading on a path upward, even if it can feel pretty rough sometimes. You are trying and you are working on your self, which means you're ahead from doing nothing. 


I hope this helps you! Know that I love you all very very much! 
Create a Nice Day! xo



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5 comments:

  1. Awesome entry, thanks for sharing all your sources!

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  2. Thanks Bianca, this is wonderful! (>^_^)>

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  3. Exactly what I needed, thankyou for such wonderful guidence and spreading your happiness x

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  4. i need suggestions if any of those books above will help my almost 12 year old son. he sees life through stormy eyes and even though he has a great life, a loving family, etc....he thinks his life is horrific. ANY reading suggestions you have would be greatly appreciated. so far, i'm failing him as a mom....and i need to fix that! :/

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    1. it happens at the age, it's not you, don't worry!!
      I'm not sure what his diet looks like but I know that's also the age when kids tend to eat more junk food so that is a big thing to watch and makes a HUGE difference! I cannot emphasize enough how what you eat effects you! :P
      for the books, "Way of the Peaceful Warrior" I think would be a good fit. Or the "Tao of Pooh" is a really easy simple read but very helpful! otherwise I'm not too sure. Send him lots of love in your thoughts, that makes a difference too :) xoxo

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