☺ Valentines Edition; Part Two: Loving Yourself! ☺

Okay, so now that I've covered some of the Relationship bumps in Part One of my Valentine's Edition, moving on to the second reason that I say screw-it to Valentine's Day…

First I'll say, no, I'm not some lonely girl moping around hating on Love (although you probably know this by now unless you are new here). I am happily married with an amazing husband. In fact, I promote love in all forms at any chance I get. So why am I writing about this anti-Valentine's day stuff? Short answer; because it does not promote real Love. There are several negative mentalities this day entails and crams into people's minds, and it's also just another silly holiday that tells you how to act and think (buy things! Conform damn you! Conform!). 

You cannot buy love, yet what Valentine's Day suggests is, not only that you can, but that you should. It also gauges your self-worth in a few ways; that you are a bad date if you don't buy presents for each other, or that you are worthless if no one buys you a present or sends you a Valentine's Day card. It also makes you feel (falsely) good or, more commonly, bad about yourself depending on how many cards or flowers you get, and whether or not you have a date. Suddenly our worth becomes based on the attention (I say attention because it is certainly not love) coming in from other people, instead of actual values, morals, and your own Self. Suddenly Love is measured by material objects and the false pretence of others--instead of where Love actually comes from; the Self. Hopefully you can see how incredibly self-destructive all of this is, how it does not actually promote Love, and how incredibly silly it all is at the end of it all. 

Sadly, most of us have been there at least once in our lives when we were a lonely teenager feeling sorry for ourselves come Valentine's Day and we didn't have a date. Hopefully you can realize that this is not a healthy mentality to have, and unfortunately too many of us have it. And what usually starts in school often carries on into adulthood, planting those negative seeds early to allow them to stick for longer. Why do we do this to ourselves? Set ourselves up for disappointment like that? Get our hopes all high and allow ourselves to be disappointed if we don't magically have a date on one day of the year? It makes no sense in reality. And so many people end up settling for some crappy date just so they are not alone. Or send flowers to yourself (which is actually not a bad thing, but I'll get to that later) in attempt to make it seem as if someone else did. 

So, entering Valentine's Day survival mode… it doesn't have to be a negative day at all, let's get on with some Real Love! 

Part Two; Choose Self Love instead!

Most of our problems don't come from others or our environments or circumstances, it comes from a lack of self love. 

No one can wager your self-worth but yourself. Seeking out the love and attention from other people means that you are not satisfying your own needs from your own self. You're not starving for love from another being, your starving for love from yourself. Sadly, we often look for it in other people though--especially because we are taught early on (as said above) that love is measured by others and not from ourselves. We need to know others think we are worthy before we can accept that we are for ourselves. And even that is often not good enough so we'll continue to degrade ourselves, be disrespectful to our emotions, and be generally self-destructive with put-downs and feelings of lack of self-worth. It's not your fault (but it is your responsibility to change it) and you are not alone if you feel this way. Our environments growing up can be pretty hostile and we learn early on to not feel good about ourselves--because others do not feel good about themselves and take it out on other people. It's a terrible cycle that has continued forever and most people don't know how to break it. It's not as hard as you think though, it just takes some time and patience and loving attention towards your self. Whenever someone is making another feel bad, it's a reflection of how they feel about themselves--the reason they give is just an excuse. So stop allowing others to make you feel bad and realize that it's not You, it's Them--or if you're the one delivering the put-downs, realize that is Is You, Not Them. No one can make you feel bad about yourself without your consent. Brush them off. No one can make you feel good about yourself either without your consent. No one can make you happy and loved except for yourself. You have to be willing to let love into your life. And you have to be willing to Love your Self.  

Stop relying on your happiness coming from another and realize that it actually comes from within yourself. You Choose if you are going to be Happy. You Choose whether or not to experience Love in your life. Love comes from within your Self. How can you expect anyone else to love you if You don't love you? And how can you expect to love anything outside of your Self if you don't love your Self? I'm not sorry to say this, because it's true, and realizing this will help you love yourself and your life. It's time for some self-love, Gorgeous! Know that you are beautiful, that you are fantastic, fun, and fabulous! Appreciate yourself so that others will do the same. And stop looking for others to tell you how amazing you are. You do not need their approval, you only need your own. Stop feeling insecure about yourself and start loving yourself! 

This Valentine's Day, instead of allowing yourself to get all self-pitying and wallowing in a box of chocolates and some sappy chick flick that will only make you feel worse, throw it all down and declare that you are SUPER! Yeah, that's right, declare your independence, and declare your love for yourself. Remind yourself that no one else can make you happy but yourself. That you don't Need another person to make you feel loved and special and wonderful. You should be able to do that for yourself. Because you are wonderful, if only you choose to see that within yourself. You are who you want to be. Your attitude is something you can choose. Your life is something you can choose. You may be stuck with yourself, but that doesn't mean you can't change and be the real you, the happy you, the you you want to be. Go ahead, choose it. Choose to be happy and to be loved. Choose to Love You. 

Again, this is simple Law of Attraction stuff. Feel love and you will allow more love to enter into your life. Appreciate yourself and you will allow others to appreciate you as well. 

Wallowing in a shameful box of chocolates upset that you didn't get roses is not empowering. It's goddamn deconstructive. Take that energy and turn it into something positive. Go out on the night if you choose, but do it for You and plan to go home alone instead of giving into the Valentine's Day crap that you need to be in another's arms that night. You don't. Be in your own loving arms. Empower yourself! Don't hate on Love, love Love. Be Positive and Loving. More negativity only breeds further negativity, towards yourself and towards others. So be Loving, all around. 

Okay, so here's what I'd like you to do on Valentine's Day…

Take the day for yourself! Buy yourself a box of chocolates (vegan and fair-trade of course ;))--not because you are trying to make it look as if someone else bought you chocolates, but because you deserve them and if anyone is getting you chocolates that day it should be You getting them for the love of your Self. :) Pamper yourself, relax, do some of the things you enjoy. Have a warm candlelit bubble bath, a cup of tea in hand and those chocolates, and soak in the joy of being you. Write yourself a love note as well, listing all the things that you Love about You--there better be at least a page full! Dance around your living room a little. Spend the evening with yourself. Cuddle up in a blanket and watch your favourite feel-good movie. Read a fantastic book. Meditate on Love. Do whatever your heart desires. Take time to love You. Because you deserve that love. And again I come back to; if you can't love yourself, how can you expect to love anything else in the world, or for others to love you?

Self-love is one of the most important things to have in your life. So learn to Love and appreciate You!

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☺ Valentines Edition; Part 1: Outlooks & Relationships ☺

I say screw it to the typical lovey dovey Valentine's Day; the let's spend money on silly red hearts, candy, and feel sorry for ourselves if we don't have someone to spend the supposedly romantic day with. I'm not much one for traditions and holidays that tell us how to feel and when to feel it. If you want a romantic evening with someone then go have a spectacularly romantic evening with someone, don't wait for Valentine's Day to pull out all the stops. If you want to be extra caring and buy a special someone a gift, then do it! Don't wait until Valentine's Day to do so. Be romantic whenever the hell you want. Yeah, you get to choose when to be super romantic, what a concept! ;) 

This is actually a long subject that I want to talk about so I've split my Valentine's Day Edition into two Parts. I will get to the self-love importance (and not crying the night away in a box of chocolates if you don't have a date), but first I want to talk about the Relationship aspects--and the way in which we set ourselves up for disappointment and create defeating expectations on Valentine's Day. I want to ask the questions; why do we set ourselves up for disappointment? Why do we get our hopes all high, and/or make these ridiculous expectations of a romantic day or evening? Here are a few reality checks I'd like to share that may help you survive Valentine's Day--and gain a new perspective.

Part One: Relationships!

First, let's be real about our partners--should you have someone to spend Valentine's Day with. I'd like to point out that guy's don't tend to be all that romantic. It's not like the chick flicks and movies where the guy is standing outside your window playing your song with a beatbox on his shoulders and a horse-drawn carriage waiting to whisk you off into some perfect sunset. I'm not saying that there aren't guys out there who do ridiculously romantic things, but there's a hell of a lot more guys who just aren't so romantically inclined. There is nothing wrong with that, they just have different parts of their brains working than women. Our expectations that men are just like in the movies is not a healthy expectation to have and usually sets us up for disappointment. Instead we should try focussing on the positive qualities of our partners, and focus on the things they Do do for us, instead of focussing on all the things we feel they do wrong.  

I'm always intrigued as to where this fairytale idea came from to begin with. That a girl must get all gushy, want presents and gifts from their partner, that their partner must do immensely romantic things all the time? Personally, I'd like to blame the movies and media, but it's hard to say at this point. There may be an innate nature within us females already that places importance on attention and caring from their partners--which in itself, is not unreasonable. Perhaps it is even some primal inner nature, like when male animals need to win over the female before courting. The male must impress the female. Truly, I'm not quite sure where it all started, but it certainly exists in many of us. Really, I don't think it matters where it came from, what does matter is doing something about it. 

Balance! The answer to all. 

In many cases guys do super sweet things for their ladies, bringing home flowers, making them breakfast, washing the dishes (??). But often these things get overlooked, comes with that negative attitude that makes you think he is not trying hard enough or cares because you have some other expectation in your mind of something he should be doing to wow you but hasn't. So you miss the things he actually Is doing. Tisk tisk. Perhaps like your expectations that he will put together some elaborately romantic date on Valentine's Day but instead he brings you home some flowers and tries to be romantic in his own way. But it wasn't what You had wanted or expected so you miss the sweetness altogether. If you want your partner to do more for you then appreciate what they do for you already, because you are probably missing it. Appreciation will make them feel good about what they're doing and encourage more nice behaviours. It's also simple Law of Attraction stuff--appreciation for what you do have so that you receive more good things. 

The other piece of advice is to let go of materialism. You don't really want to be won over by Things now do you? I understand that once upon a time the "thought" behind a gift is the important part, but let's face it, today there are plenty of girls who just want lavish gifts that they pick out themselves instead of even giving the guy a chance to pick out something thoughtful. Tell me how is this romantic again? You don't want to force your partner into buying you things, it takes away any notion of romance and caring. Let them appreciate you in their own way. If they surprise you with a gift, fantastic! If they don't, still fantastic! Remember that your love is not something that needs to be bought. Love should be showed, not bought.

On the other end of things, you don't want your partner to not put in any effort at all either. Balance, remember? And this goes both ways! Too often women have this expectation that their partner should be pulling out all the stops and dazzling her with splendid gifts and surprises. Well, what have you done lately? It may be wise to take a look at your own actions before you go judging theirs. Regardless, both people should be putting effort into the relationship, otherwise there isn't a relationship to be had. Love needs to come pouring in from both people. Otherwise it's not a relationship, it's a mildly dying friendship. Know when enough is enough or whether there is something worth saving. You are never stuck in a relationship, remember that. You get to choose. Always. 

But, again, both people should be putting in some effort. You should be doing nice, thoughtful, loving things for each other, as people often do at the beginning of the relationship because you're trying to win them over, but the longer you are together the less you feel like you need to do these things. I mean, you've won them already, so why keep trying? Do! Because it shows that you are actually still in love and care about the other person, that they are still worth the effort. Just because you are together, even "tied the knot" "til death do you part," doesn't mean you should just conclude that you don't need to try in the relationship anymore. Effort will keep a relationship strong. You Do still need to win each other over, or else the relationship becomes boring and stale and eventually the spark goes out. Keep the spark going. Do nice things for your partner! Period. Not just on Valentine's Day!

Of course, not everything that I have to say applies to everyone, different parts will apply to different people. Or perhaps not at all. But I have a feeling that chances are at least part of this applies to most people. 

Balance. It is always the key to happy equality in all aspects of life. And a smile and positive attitude of course, that good attitude will allow you to enjoy all of your relationships and see which ones are worth having. So, to summarize a bit:

Express Gratitude for the other person and seeing their good side instead of focussing attention on their negativities. 

Let go of Expectations and welcome what actually comes.  

Always put effort into the relationship, it should be coming in from both partners. 

Spend quality time with your partner. Be attentive, loving, caring, and thoughtful always. Be respectful. Communicate. 

Oh yeah, and say "Screw it!" to traditions! ;) 

Join me for Part Two--being loving towards yourself and having a positive attitude when you're single. Basically, how to survive Valentine's Day with a beaming smile on your face! ;) 

Have a beautiful day! 

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♥ Holiday Shopping "Guide" ♥

Alright, so, in all honesty, this feels a little late to be writing up one of these, however better now then, say… next week… right? ;)

These are my rules and suggestions for holiday shopping…

How to Shop

Shop Small, keep it Minimal. Don't go overboard and spend a sh*t ton of money--especially if money is tight. It's the Thought of the gift that matters, remember? Remember?! 

Next, think before you buy. How many gifts can you think of that you receive that you don't end up using? You know the little stocking stuffers… not to say these can't be Awesome!… just be sure to put real thought into the gifts instead of going crazy spending everywhere you go is all I'm saying. ;) 

Tight budget? Skip the presents altogether orrrrr agree to all make the gifts yourselves. This doesn't mean crappy gifts, it means gifts with real thought and attention to them. (think the Friends episode when Chandler and Monica make each other their valentine's gifts ;)). If you still want to do something special for the holidays but are forgoing the presents, then, more precious than physical gifts, how about making a plan to do something as a family that you'll remember forever? :) 

Shopping Ethics

So, if you Are indeed buying presents this year let's pay closet attention to the ethics of what you are buying. 

Is it environmentally friendly, and/or made from renewable materials? Is it packaged in layers and layers of plastic? Is it fair-trade? Is it made by some greedy heartless corporation that treats their employees and the environment like doodoo? 

Just take a moment before you buy, and really consider if there are better options.  

Also, think about how you're wrapping presents. All that wrapping paper just ends up in the garbage or being recycled, all to be wrapped for one present for one day. Get creative, wrap your presents in newspaper or cereal boxes, or whatever you can reuse! This doesn't mean you can't still make them look pretty! There are a ton of cute DIY ideas out there, so get eco and have fun with it! :) 

One more thing… Food!! Try to eat locally as well, eat Real food, be ethical in this area as well. Even try a vegan christmas! ;)

Where to Shop

Alright, so now it's shopping time!

First and foremost; support Local, independent Artists, Designers, and Crafters! Why? It's better for the economy, you're supporting small business instead of heartless corporations, you're putting money back into the community, it's more environmentally friendly, you're more likely to get friendlier customer service, and you'll make an artist very very happy. ;) 

If you can't find what you're looking for at the local craft shows then these are where I turn to next…

Handmade! I, personally, almost always choose handmade handmade handmade. Maybe it's because I'm an artist myself and know lots of artist friends making a living off their amazing handmade talents, but handmade is the bestest! Again, you're not supporting some heartless corporation, you're buying something instead that is authentic, unique, and made with care and love and genuine creativity, and you're putting money back to the individual. Power to the people! Yayy! 

Check out sites like etsy, artfire, and storenvy. 

My other suggestion is to support Local people-owned stores in your area. Sure the internet is full of vast products and sites, and, well, heartless corporations… so put your money instead into supporting local shops and stores. Op against the chain stores and instead the stores that you know are locally owned, who actually profit from the business and aren't just paid minimum wage while the money goes to corporations. Most of these smaller stores are more likely to carry quality products as well that aren't going to fall apart. And the bottom line is that it's always better to support local, keeping the love and money in the community and supporting your fellow local peeps!

Lastly, when all of those fail, these are some online stores that I like to turn to because you're still supporting a good cause and these stores tend to carry good quality, smaller-run company products that, at the very least, have better ethics and standards, plus you can score some awesome deals. ;) 

Ethical Ocean, Veganessentials, Karmavore (visit the shop in person if you're in Vancouver, it's fantastic!), Vegan Cuts, Pure Citizen.  

Or donate to a local charity or make a World WildlifeFund adoption (one of my favourites!), or Farm Sanctuary adoption, or spend some time volunteering at your local animal shelter or food bank.  

So that's that. Where do you like to shop? What are you doing this holiday season? How do you holiday shop? 

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♥ Black Friday Sale! ♥

Hope all my lovelies in the U.S. had a lovely compassionate and grateful Thanksgiving! Now time for some shopping right? ;) 

ReLove Plan.et is having a sale over at the Etsy shop!

10% Off plus free surprise gifts with purchase! Coupon Code: BLACKFRIDAY

Annnd, spend $100 or more and get a free necklace of your choice! (just let me know which one in the "notes to seller" when making your order, no code required) ^_^

Goooo nowwww:

WWW.RELOVEPLANET.ETSY.COM

Happy Friday!! xoxo

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Ⓥ Vegan Kitchen: Happy Thanksgiving! Ⓥ

It's Thanksgiving weekend here in Canada, so… Happy Thanksgiving Canada! :) 

With my family being a sick we didn't get to do a thanksgiving dinner together, but my hubby and I hosted a Vegan Thanksgiving Potluck at our place with my brother and good friend Tam. Vegan potlucks are the best thanksgivings ever, or for any traditional festive meal. 

[silly face photo reel... life's not complete without one ;)]

Cory made a quinoa kale salad. And I roasted up red kuri squash, parsnips, carrots, and garlic from our garden--and added some sweet potato in there as well. I also made tofu balls and vegan gravy--my usual go-tos for  dinners such as these. Everyone always loves the food, vegan or not, so why the hell not? Beats some poor murdered turkey any day. 

For dessert Tam made the most amazing Lemon poppyseed quinoa flour cake! Sooooo good! 

We stuffed ourselves full of amazing food and enjoyed some great company. All in all, thanksgiving was lovely. :) 

If you're looking for your own ideas for a vegan festive dinner then be sure to check out my other post with suggestions and recipes as well: Holiday Feast. :)

Happy Thanksgiving Canada! Show gratitude wherever you are, you don't need an excuse to give thanks. 

[how many times can I repeat the exact same big goofy smile? Thiiiiss many!]

So, what are you grateful for? How did you spend Thanksgiving--or how do you plan on spending it if you're not in Canada? What are your favourite vegan festive meals? 

Create a nice day!! Much Love and gratitude! :) 

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Ⓥ Vegan Kitchen: Root Vegetable Roast! Ⓥ

This is one of my favourite meals to make, it's the perfect holiday dinner replacement and perfect on a cold cozy evening. It's also not that hard to make, just takes a little preparation chopping up all the veggies. I almost felt a little silly posting this recipe it's so simple, but totally worth sharing, so here we go! ;) 

Root Vegatable Roast

Root Vegetables (I usually like to do any combination of; 1 large Sweet Potato, 1 large Yam, 1 Kuri squash, 4 medium Carrots, 1 large Parsnip)--enough to fill a large casserole dish.

2 tbsp Olive Oil 

Seasoning: 

1 tsp Salt

1 tsp Pepper

1 tsp Garlic Powder

1/2 tsp Cumin 

1/2 tsp Mustard Seed

1/2 tsp Oregano

2 tsp Thyme

Preheat oven to 400℉.

Chop up all your vegetables and place them in a large casserole dish. Sprinkle the seasoning and oil over top and cover with foil, if you don't have a lid. Cook in the oven for about 1 hour, gently stirring about every 20 minutes. 

Makes 4 large, or 6 small servings (depending on the size of your casserole dish). 

I love to make this with Vegan Gravy and Rice "stuffing." Tofu Balls are also a lovely way to complete a Holiday Feast with this recipe. Perfect comfort food and healthy at that! :) 

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Ⓥ Vegan Kitchen: Rice "Stuffing" Ⓥ

A lovely, easy gluten-free alternative to tradition stuffing but still packed full of lovely flavour. 

Rice "Stuffing"

1 cup Brown Rice

1 cup Water

1 cup Vegetable Broth

1/2 tsp Salt

1/4 tsp Pepper

1 tsp Garlic Powder

1 Tbsp dried Parsley

1 tsp Thyme

Optional: add in chopped celery or onion. 

In a medium pot, add all the ingredients together, bring to a boil and then reduce to simmer for about 45 minutes to an hour--until the rice is fully cooked. 

Serve! Super easy! 

Makes approximately 4 servings. 

Goes great with Root Vegetable Roast, Tofu Balls, and Vegan Gravy for a lovely holiday feast! 

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Ⓥ Vegan Kitchen: Vegan Gravy Ⓥ

 This is so simple and easy to make, plus you're not using unhealthy animal fat (yuckyyyy!). I don't know why you'd ever want to use gross meat-stuff ever again. ;) 

This is also gluten-free, although you can make this with just about any flour. :) 

Vegan Gravy

3 cups Vegetable Broth

3 Tbsp Olive Oil, divided

1/3 cup Rice Flour (or any other flour)

dashes of black pepper

3/4 tsp Salt

In a heated medium pot, add the oil along with the flour, stir together. It should become a gooey clump. Add a little more oil if necessary. Toast for approx. 15 minutes in the pan until it smells toasty and turns a medium brown colour. Stir practically the entire time so it cooks evenly. Use a whisk to avoid clumping as well. 

Stream in the 2 cups of broth, whisking constantly so it doesn't clump--the trick is to add the broth slowly, if you do it too quickly it will clump. Whisk until it's thick and smooth. 

Add pepper and salt to taste, parsley is a nice addition as well, feel free to play around with flavours.

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Ⓥ Vegan Kitchen: Our Thanksgiving Potluck! Ⓥ

So it's Sunday which is usually Recipe day however it's late in the day and I am busy cooking myself dinner--but allowing myself a short distraction--however I won't leave you without at least a peak into my vegan kitchen this beautiful Sunday day ;). 

Last weekend Cory and I hosted a Vegan Thanksgiving Potluck at our place with some close friends. It was an awesome way to enjoy a fabulous vegan thanksgiving--with half the work! In fact, I think it was my favorite Thanksgiving to date! Everyone made a delicious dish that was both Vegan and gluten-free and I can't put into words just how amazing everyone's dish was. Potlucks are such a fun way to try new food and recipes and get people creative and thinking vegan if they don't already. Yes, my vegan master plan is revealed (insert evil maniacal laughter here). But in all seriousness, it was fantastic... no wait, no being serious! Life is too awesome! It was fabulous and wonderful and filled with laughter, smiles, and silliness! The food was delicious and the company fantastic! What was not to love?! Plus I spent all of that day dancing around to pop music while cleaning and cooking. A perfect day. But enough talk, here's some visual stimulation for you to drool over...

My Macaroni & Cauliflower Cashew-cheez (recipe here!) and Tofu Balls (recipe here!) with a gravy sauce! 

 Talia's Cauliflower Bake with lemon juice dressing and capers! and Max's Mashed Yam Potatoes!

Tam's Roasted Squash with maple syrup dressing! 

My lovely friend Bridget also brought a yummy carrot salad but she was a bit late arriving and I never got a picture. But you can take my word for it, it looked and tasted fantastic! As did everything! 

And for dessert, that yummy Pumpkin Cheesecake Pie I posted the recipe for last week! ;) 

Look at that beautiful plate!! There was such a variety and diversity of flavors that complimented each other perfectly--and there was no planning involved! So good! 

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