☺ Applying a Positive Mental Attitude to Your Life ☺

No one gets out of this life without having to deal with stuff...great stuff, wonderful stuff, happy stuff, crappy stuff, sad stuff, tragic stuff....and sometimes you look at other people and think..Wow, they are soooo lucky, their life is sooooo good. That is perception, what you are witnessing is how each individual deals with the circumstances of their life...that is the MAGIC of LIFE...you always get to CHOOSE how you react to the circumstances...because everyone deals differently. You get to choose your reactions. If someone reacts positively ...then they are seen as LUCKY...well their attitude is lucky..but life is life is life for everyone.

Life is life is life. For everyone. 

The truth is that everyone has to deal with ups and downs with life. No one person is more gifted than the other--unless they happen to be using the power of the Law of Attraction to their advantage (which is still Them putting life into action), but even then, sh!t happens. Such is life. But how are some people always so happy and positive and seem to be unfazed by the dark messes of the world? 

Firstly: they're not. 

Everyone has downs, everyone has a hard time with things from time to time, because no one is perfect and no one has perfect control over their emotions all the time. No one. Probably not even those wise old monks we hear so much about. Just because you don't see someone fall apart, doesn't mean they don't on the inside, or doesn't mean they don't go home with the need to unwind there instead. Everyone goes through things, everyone cries (in fact, crying is very helpful and healing and releasing), and everyone experiences the drops of their perfect moods. 

Everyone is human. Got it? Okay, let's move on. 

Secondly: Some people just know how to change Perspective.

Perspective is everything, and one of the most valuable and helpful lessons I ever learned was to change my attitude. As already mentioned, things happen to everyone, but the people who seem the happiest are the ones who know how to deal with their conflicts accordingly. This is when having a Positive Mental Attitude comes in. When shit hits the fan, you have two choices. One, you fall apart, get mad, get frustrated, and let it destroy your mood. Or two, (even if you have to first go through One) you pick up a smile and try looking at things from a different perspective. Perspective is Everything! No matter how bad a situation can be, there is always a bright side. Even if the bright side is that you get to learn a hard lesson that will make you a stronger person. 

It's not what happens to you in life, it's how you Deal With It that matters. Trust me. 

I have had happy times in my life where things were effortless and going right, and I've had times when I thought things couldn't get any worse. The irony is that during one of those periods of my life when things were falling apart, I was actually at my happiest--and it was all thanks to picking up an optimistic, Positive Attitude and putting things into perspective. That attitude saved me, absolutely and surely, because things at that point in my life were one of the worst points of my parent's messy divorce and custody battles of my younger siblings, and emotional traumas. That Positive Attitude allowed me to be resilient, allowed me to keep smiling, and made me more helpful to those around me as well. I took time to focus on the good things: the other great things I currently had in my life, as well as why the "bad" situation was a good thing--again, perception is everything. 

Put Things Into Perspective

Focussing on the outcome you desire is a good alternative to dwelling on the problem. If you can focus on the outcome, then your mind (or the universe) can help you get there much quicker and with much less heart-ache.  

Instead of allowing yourself to get overwhelmed and negative, take a step back. Try looking at things logically--which I understand isn't always easy when you're emotional, but take a few breaths, get out some paper (even if you're still crying when you start) and start scribbling down things that might be good about what's going on around you. There are always different angles that you can look at things from; if you don't believe me, just think about how one Same Situation can be perceived Completely differently by each individual involved. There are always different points of view. Your goal is to find the point of view that will help you. The Positive Side. The side that will get you through the mess and put a smile back on your face. 

Plus, if all else fails, remember: nothing is ever permanent, including emotions and feelings, and, after time, you Will feel better. 

Change Your Mind and you'll Change Your Life

If you can pick up this way of thinking then life will become much easier. Life is based on perception, therefore, if you can change your perception you will change your life. You have in your mind the power to do extraordinary things, and one of those extraordinary things is the capacity to change your life through simply Thinking. Think Happy, Think Positive. See what happens. It can really be quite magical and, well, life-changing. 

Practice makes perfect, and while this practice may feel hard at the start, the more you apply it, the easier it becomes. And it's always worth it. Simply taking a few minutes to sit down, jot down your thoughts, and find the positive means much less time wasted stressing yourself into sickness. 

Remember: your Attitude counts for everything. So work on that Positive Attitude at all times!  

A Personal Example:

Using one of my more recent experiences, I'd like to show you how changing your attitude can work… 

Just over a year ago, a flood rushed through our rental home. The entire basement was flooded in several feet of water, and the upstairs was washed over with grimy dirty pools and caked in stinky mud. It happened when I was up town (we live on a mountain and downtown is higher, while our apartment was at the bottom, very close to the lake). I came home to the mess and the mud washed right up to our front door--which was when the "no, no, no" panic began to set in. The entryway was a pool of murky muddy water, and, upon entering, most of our living room was in the same state, drifting down the hall and partly into our bedroom. 

Well, our landlord did nothing and was rather useless during this whole ordeal--we couldn't even get a hold of him for a day or two. So we began cleaning the mess ourselves--we didn't have a lot of options after all. Even after cleaning, the place Stank. The fire department was pumping the water out of the basement and the river that had taken over our backyard (not exaggerating here, it was a River!). After all of this was said and done, the basement was still so thick in mud that there was nothing that we could really do but to start salvaging the mess. All of my silkscreening gear (for my Job) was down in that basement, as well as our expensive camping gear, bikes, and the washer and dryer that we owned. 

Now, while our first reaction was indeed the panic and frustration of the whole mess and the ordeal to follow, we let it pass. We knew that stressing about it wasn't going to help or get us anywhere. 

So we started putting things into Perspective: 

First: it was the perfect incentive to Move the hell out of this place that we had been wanting to do for a while. 

Second: we started to list the things we were Grateful for: 

We had insurance coverage (which after some back and forth bickering and arguments, we were able to receive--bastard insurance companies trying to wiggle their way out of covering us--pfft), so anything that was damaged could be replaced. Our landlord couldn't say no to an early leave out of our lease because, well, our place was literally uninhabitable with the stench coming up from the basement of possible sewer water at that! My screens (for silkscreening) had at least been up somewhere where they remained undamaged by the water and my expensive inks were also still in tact--it was also summer still so I could silk screen outside (how delightful!). Our kitties were safe through everything, thank goodness! And so forth! 

So, with our gratitude and perspective in check, it was on to a Positive Solution: Moving! 

This was the biggest Positive Outlook out of the whole thing. We had a month to find a new place, no excuses allowed. And if it weren't for being armed with our Positive Attitudes and the Law of Attraction, we might have been screwed. My partner and I decided to write lists (things are twice as likely to come true when you write them down!) of what we wanted in our new home--after all, we were aiming for an upgrade and wouldn't settle for anything less. So we made our lists, and made sure they were in line with one another so that we were both manifesting the same thing. And we started looking. We looked at several places throughout the month, and even though it was a little discouraging at times, we didn't settle. And, guess what? We found our dream home. No joke. Pretty much everything that we'd written down on our lists we found--and if we didn't then we received variations! Our landlords are the nicest people we could ever ask for--for real, we adore them, they're the best! We even have a House to ourselves, in stead of some dingy duplex. We'd also made sure we wrote down how much we wanted to be paying for rent, and we even came within that range (which to the unbelieving, was an impossible find). 

So, moral of the story? 

Thanks to Perception, Positive Thinking, and Focussing on a Positive Outcome, our "Disaster" became a blessing in disguise. And this lesson applies to anything and everything in life. There is no point in stressing, there is only a point in turning your attitude around and Thinking Positive!

Give it a try, practice, practice, practice. Remember there is always a Positive Solution. Always.   

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{life reflections}

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{life reflections}

 Weekly thoughts and rambles. A glimpse into my mind and world. 

These are entries that I might jot down in my Happy Diary; what happens when we put our fingers to the keyboard and allow our thoughts to flow uninhibited. Reflections from the soul. 

Reflections of life.  

I hope to leave you inspired. 

If you want to share your own reflections of the week please leave a link to your "life reflections" entry in the comments.

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You won't appreciate the sun without the rain. In this moment the outside world is doing both. On the emotional level of life perhaps it's always doing both. I mean think about it for a moment. In a single day we can experience such ups and downs in a matter of seconds apart. As if to remind us to breathe, to take a look around, to see that the world around us is a roller coaster of emotions and events and people all spinning around us at unpredictable speeds. It is true though. We can't appreciate the sun without a little rain. Getting stuck in the mud is the problem. Even though we can still look up to the skies and smile when the rays of sunshine do come along, inevitably we're still stuck in the mud. However getting out of the mud at our feet is as simple as taking one step. And then another. And another. Until the mud has dried from our feet and we can feel the warmth of the sun resonate through every fibre of our being. 

Have I lost you? I think I lost myself a little. But isn't that also part of life? Finding and rediscovering ourselves? ;)

Anyways. You can't have the good without a little sprinkle of bad. But we must keep moving and let the rolling ventures of our lives continue on, leading us to new heights and emotions and experiences. Such is life. Beautiful wonder-filled life. 

We must learn to become bendy. Yes, bendy. To life that is… although flexibility is also great for your body. ;) Adaptability to what life hands you, learning to go with the flow, to not resist, to welcome good things into your life and releasing the bad. To focus on the good. Always seeing and seeking the positive in any experience. And to love yourself. These are keys to life. The keys that will make all the other lessons easier to learn and all the tribulations easier to overcome. 

The road can be bumpy and applying these lessons may take time, but they should always be there for you to turn to, like a cheat sheet of life. What a wonderful cheat sheet. I wish they taught us things like this in school. Can you imagine what sort of brilliant world we would live in if they did?

[Anna Hrachovec]

Anyways. I'm like anyone, experiencing the ups and downs of life, applying the lessons, moving forward. I'm no superhuman. I fall down. Sometimes it's just a trip. Sometimes I fall down and stay down for a while wallowing in the cycle of self pity until I choose to pull myself out. Because it's always a choice. But despite the downward spirals there is something that is always reassuring to me. Simply look at how far you've come. This is what I do. I was a suicidal, self-harming, depressed girl for a long time. Today, even with the lows of life, I am strong and positive and always find a way to climb back up. You just have to be willing to put yourself into a positive place, to push your way out of the dark tunnels. You have to be willing to accept that you Deserve good in your life. And you have to be willing to make it happen. It's so much easier to wallow in self pity because it's practically been taught to us through insecure society and life. It takes work and determination to wake up in the morning and say "Today is going to be awesome!" and then go out and keep that mentality. But practice makes perfect and, by golly, is it ever worth giving yourself daily pep talks to reach a state of bliss and happiness. Abolishing words like "I can't" or telling yourself that a particular kind of life isn't possible for you. It's bullshit talk, that's what it is. It's self-defeating, self-pitying attitudes that will get you no where. You have a choice, every single second of every single day and I want you to stop putting yourself down. Because you deserve and CAN stand up and be awesome and blissfully happy. You can, you can, you can. Oh yes you can. So go do it. Now.  

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☺ Valentines Edition; Part 1: Outlooks & Relationships ☺

I say screw it to the typical lovey dovey Valentine's Day; the let's spend money on silly red hearts, candy, and feel sorry for ourselves if we don't have someone to spend the supposedly romantic day with. I'm not much one for traditions and holidays that tell us how to feel and when to feel it. If you want a romantic evening with someone then go have a spectacularly romantic evening with someone, don't wait for Valentine's Day to pull out all the stops. If you want to be extra caring and buy a special someone a gift, then do it! Don't wait until Valentine's Day to do so. Be romantic whenever the hell you want. Yeah, you get to choose when to be super romantic, what a concept! ;) 

This is actually a long subject that I want to talk about so I've split my Valentine's Day Edition into two Parts. I will get to the self-love importance (and not crying the night away in a box of chocolates if you don't have a date), but first I want to talk about the Relationship aspects--and the way in which we set ourselves up for disappointment and create defeating expectations on Valentine's Day. I want to ask the questions; why do we set ourselves up for disappointment? Why do we get our hopes all high, and/or make these ridiculous expectations of a romantic day or evening? Here are a few reality checks I'd like to share that may help you survive Valentine's Day--and gain a new perspective.

Part One: Relationships!

First, let's be real about our partners--should you have someone to spend Valentine's Day with. I'd like to point out that guy's don't tend to be all that romantic. It's not like the chick flicks and movies where the guy is standing outside your window playing your song with a beatbox on his shoulders and a horse-drawn carriage waiting to whisk you off into some perfect sunset. I'm not saying that there aren't guys out there who do ridiculously romantic things, but there's a hell of a lot more guys who just aren't so romantically inclined. There is nothing wrong with that, they just have different parts of their brains working than women. Our expectations that men are just like in the movies is not a healthy expectation to have and usually sets us up for disappointment. Instead we should try focussing on the positive qualities of our partners, and focus on the things they Do do for us, instead of focussing on all the things we feel they do wrong.  

I'm always intrigued as to where this fairytale idea came from to begin with. That a girl must get all gushy, want presents and gifts from their partner, that their partner must do immensely romantic things all the time? Personally, I'd like to blame the movies and media, but it's hard to say at this point. There may be an innate nature within us females already that places importance on attention and caring from their partners--which in itself, is not unreasonable. Perhaps it is even some primal inner nature, like when male animals need to win over the female before courting. The male must impress the female. Truly, I'm not quite sure where it all started, but it certainly exists in many of us. Really, I don't think it matters where it came from, what does matter is doing something about it. 

Balance! The answer to all. 

In many cases guys do super sweet things for their ladies, bringing home flowers, making them breakfast, washing the dishes (??). But often these things get overlooked, comes with that negative attitude that makes you think he is not trying hard enough or cares because you have some other expectation in your mind of something he should be doing to wow you but hasn't. So you miss the things he actually Is doing. Tisk tisk. Perhaps like your expectations that he will put together some elaborately romantic date on Valentine's Day but instead he brings you home some flowers and tries to be romantic in his own way. But it wasn't what You had wanted or expected so you miss the sweetness altogether. If you want your partner to do more for you then appreciate what they do for you already, because you are probably missing it. Appreciation will make them feel good about what they're doing and encourage more nice behaviours. It's also simple Law of Attraction stuff--appreciation for what you do have so that you receive more good things. 

The other piece of advice is to let go of materialism. You don't really want to be won over by Things now do you? I understand that once upon a time the "thought" behind a gift is the important part, but let's face it, today there are plenty of girls who just want lavish gifts that they pick out themselves instead of even giving the guy a chance to pick out something thoughtful. Tell me how is this romantic again? You don't want to force your partner into buying you things, it takes away any notion of romance and caring. Let them appreciate you in their own way. If they surprise you with a gift, fantastic! If they don't, still fantastic! Remember that your love is not something that needs to be bought. Love should be showed, not bought.

On the other end of things, you don't want your partner to not put in any effort at all either. Balance, remember? And this goes both ways! Too often women have this expectation that their partner should be pulling out all the stops and dazzling her with splendid gifts and surprises. Well, what have you done lately? It may be wise to take a look at your own actions before you go judging theirs. Regardless, both people should be putting effort into the relationship, otherwise there isn't a relationship to be had. Love needs to come pouring in from both people. Otherwise it's not a relationship, it's a mildly dying friendship. Know when enough is enough or whether there is something worth saving. You are never stuck in a relationship, remember that. You get to choose. Always. 

But, again, both people should be putting in some effort. You should be doing nice, thoughtful, loving things for each other, as people often do at the beginning of the relationship because you're trying to win them over, but the longer you are together the less you feel like you need to do these things. I mean, you've won them already, so why keep trying? Do! Because it shows that you are actually still in love and care about the other person, that they are still worth the effort. Just because you are together, even "tied the knot" "til death do you part," doesn't mean you should just conclude that you don't need to try in the relationship anymore. Effort will keep a relationship strong. You Do still need to win each other over, or else the relationship becomes boring and stale and eventually the spark goes out. Keep the spark going. Do nice things for your partner! Period. Not just on Valentine's Day!

Of course, not everything that I have to say applies to everyone, different parts will apply to different people. Or perhaps not at all. But I have a feeling that chances are at least part of this applies to most people. 

Balance. It is always the key to happy equality in all aspects of life. And a smile and positive attitude of course, that good attitude will allow you to enjoy all of your relationships and see which ones are worth having. So, to summarize a bit:

Express Gratitude for the other person and seeing their good side instead of focussing attention on their negativities. 

Let go of Expectations and welcome what actually comes.  

Always put effort into the relationship, it should be coming in from both partners. 

Spend quality time with your partner. Be attentive, loving, caring, and thoughtful always. Be respectful. Communicate. 

Oh yeah, and say "Screw it!" to traditions! ;) 

Join me for Part Two--being loving towards yourself and having a positive attitude when you're single. Basically, how to survive Valentine's Day with a beaming smile on your face! ;) 

Have a beautiful day! 

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