☺ Video Blogs: Actively Participating in Your Own Happiness--and what it brought me ☺

Today I thought I would share with you the last few video blogs I posted up on my channel. In one I speak more of Actively Participating in Your Own Happiness, as well as how this helped me to step into this new life chapter I'm in now. It was important to me to share my story, to share the fears and anxieties I experienced before being able to make such bold and huge life changes--to let others know that what they are going through may be normal and that you are not alone. I also wanted to share these things because seeing how much my life has changed and how happy I am now I hope would provide some inspiration and courage in your own lives. Sharing bits and pieces of my life and my story are always fun to me for these reasons; if I can change someone else's life, spark up a fire back in your own soul, or help you in any way then I feel like my work serves a greater purpose--and therefore my own story serves a greater purpose, which it does in each of us. Never underestimate the power of your own life and your own story. It is magical, it is gifted, and you gift the world by being in it. 

Anyway, please enjoy my rambling video blogs for now. ;)  

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{life reflections} - Life is What You Make It

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{life reflections}

 Weekly thoughts and rambles. A glimpse into my mind and world. 

Entries that I might jot down in my Happy Diary; the release of thoughts to flow uninhibited. Reflections from the soul. 

Reflections of life.  

I hope to leave you inspired. 

If you want to share your own reflections of the week please leave a link to your "life reflections" entry in the comments for all to find and see.

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Life is What You Make It

Happiness has come much more easily these days, especially when I compare current state of affairs to the first half of 2014 and the later half of 2013. Oh the turbulence! I still cannot believe how many people I know (or, actually, just about Everyone I know) who are going through Huge life changes, rocky dilemmas, and ordeals of varying degrees and depths. What a strange year this has been. It continues to blow my mind. So many life-altering changes shaking our foundations and encouraging us to build new ones. Life is truly magical, if not incredibly trying at times. Chin up! Things are getting better for most of the people I know; I heard this crazy mercury in retrograde, or whatever other cosmic blame we have handy, is on its way out and things are bound to become more stable soon! This is the little bit of reassurance I wanted to pass along to anyone still enduring the turbulence of this year. That being said, reassurance is nice and all, but reassurance is nothing if you don't take a step up and take control of your own life. 

Ordeals happen. All the time. They can cripple us, or they can build us up. Your choice. People hate that this is their own choice. Hate, hate, hate. Taking responsibility for your own life can feel like such an arduous task. I mean, who has time for That?!… *extended pause*… Everyone should make room to better their lives. I don't care how busy your life is, squeeze in that sprinkle of happiness, that lesson on self-worth, that practice from all those life lessons you've read about. It's all in our hands. Well, that is: Our own Lives are in Our Own Hands. Only you are responsible for the make or break of your own story. You are the author, the poet, the artist, the dreamer and believer of your own future and present. 

Look at it this way: when we are handed a life ordeal, it is like being handed a sticky piece of playdoh. Sometimes when it is handed to us it has the shape of something unlikeable, perhaps even terrifying. Sometimes it's a bit tough to mould, or sometimes too sticky. But, despite any of that, what we do with that unlikeable shape is up to us. We can mould it into something new and beautiful, or we can keep poking it with a stick or ignoring it, and hope that it just fixes itself. Life takes work; but it's a good kind of work. The situations you are handed in life are malleable, so long as you Choose to do something with them. Every ordeal holds a lesson, and therefore something to allow you to grow. Working on your own sense of happiness and fulfillment is the most important work you will ever do, so don't neglect it! Be pro-active about your own life, circumstances, relationships, and situations. 

These are not new words for me to teach--or preach, if you choose to see it that way ;)--but they are valuable beyond measure. I speak them particularly at the moment because I can see what being pro-active in my own life has brought me (perhaps in comparison to some people I know who are less pro-active, or times in my own life when I was less pro-active). I have worked hard at my life; the happiness and state of mind that I have achieved did not happen by accident. I was a suicidal, depressed, self-loathing girl, constantly blaming everything outside myself, wallowing in my problems, and feeding the self-misery for years. The decision to change and be happy is the biggest one you will make, because if you make it with conviction and from the heart then things will start to fall into place; perhaps gradually and with much struggle in the beginning, but fall in place nonetheless. All of that pro-active work I took within my own life lead me to be as strong as I am today. I'm not perfect by a long-shot; it still takes me forever to make the right decisions for myself, I still cry, I still hurt, I still stumble and fall flat on my face. The biggest part that changed, I do believe, is my optimism, my resilience, and my persistence. During downward swings I can still manage to smile; and after however long it takes me in any given situation, I remember that I am Worthy, Valuable, and that I Deserve Happiness. That remembrance fuels the heart back into passion, and when we fuel the heart with that kind of fire, solutions begin to present themselves. 

If someone had told that depressed suicidal girl where I would be today, I would not have believed it were possible. At all. And even today, if someone had told me four months ago how much my life was going to have changed in this moment right now, I would not have believed them either. There are many parts in my present life that I desired for a long time, either close to the surface, fully aware, or in denial somewhere in the subconscious. But I wanted these things. I have them now. And I couldn't be happier--or mind blown. During these last three months I have moments of awe and disbelief about how dreamlike my life feels right now, of the man I am currently with, of the dreams I am achieving, and the life I am living. I have these moments multiple times Daily! That is how blessed and grateful I feel right now--and how much my mind is blown away by how much things can change! 

  

Life isn't perfect, however. There will always be ordeals, huge life bumps, curveballs, and challenges--again, such things never cease to amaze me, especially when they seem to come out of nowhere. Something in particular happened to me this week that caused a whirlwind of emotions. I went back and forth between negative emotions and being optimistic again like a swinging pendulum. This lasted a few days. In spite of this, I was still able to remain level-headed and focus on what I had to be grateful for. Even though it was a trying ordeal, I didn't allow myself to wallow in self-pity or any other emotion, for I don't leave room in my life to stay stuck in those sorts of emotions anymore. But they come up. Frustration and emotional distraught still bounce back and forth--and they should--while you come to terms and face any ordeal. It's a game of ping pong, but you always have the choice to keep batting away the negative emotions with positive ones until the positive ones win and the calm returns to your life. Gratitude is absolutely your best weapon in any trouble--I recommend using it all the time in every single situation that comes across your path. In the end, once we've allowed ourselves to feel the full spectrum of emotions, we can only accept what has happened and make the best of it. There is no point in dragging out or holding onto negative emotions, so practice letting them go! Remember: Optimism and Gratitude, use them liberally and they will change your entire life, I promise you! 

  

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{life reflections} The Human Capacity to Judge, and Incapacity to be Happy for Another

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{life reflections}

 Weekly thoughts and rambles. A glimpse into my mind and world. 

Entries that I might jot down in my Happy Diary; the release of thoughts to flow uninhibited. Reflections from the soul. 

Reflections of life.  

I hope to leave you inspired. 

If you want to share your own reflections of the week please leave a link to your "life reflections" entry in the comments for all to find and see.

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The Human Capacity to Judge, and Incapacity to be Happy for Another

Life has generally been feeling pretty amazing. It feels like the storm is finally passing and the sunshine can brightly beam its beautiful rays back down into this chaotic life. Life genuinely feels positive, optimistic, and full of new life, passion, joys, and excitement. 

But I know what some of you might be thinking… she's lying, she's making it up, she's trying to convince the world that she's happy when she's not. 

What prompts such an accusation, you might ask? Well, there have been quite the new experiences and lessons through such big changes in my life, and people's reactions and behaviours have perhaps been the most interesting, if not annoying, or disheartening, to see. 

The thing is that I did expect a certain amount of gossip, a certain amount of people's opinions to twist the story of my recent divorce around and redeliver it in a less amicable way. Things between me and my husband have been as smooth as they can be. I don't hold anything against him, and I hope he doesn't hold anything against me either. What I have found annoying is that people try to messy that. It's as if people are so afraid of change (even if it's not to do with them but simply around them) that they have to fight it any way they can, or pour fuel on the fire, or start a fire altogether. People are unable to be happy for others. People also judge others entirely too freely and unthoughtfully. This has been a huge eye-opener to a concept I was already fairly familiar with. However, it never ceases to amaze me.

The thing is that I don't want to be posting publicly about this whole divorce with my (ex)husband. I have written bits and pieces about my own perspective and lessons along the way regarding these big changes in my life--as a reflection of life, being human, and the experience of learning and growing and helping one another in the process (I am a writer, after all). But I have kept things respectfully distant as to the details of our relationship-ending; and, I do believe, with tact. This is when gossip becomes extra annoying. I have been pretty open about things that I felt a certain need or wish to, so that people may understand things and Not gossip. What people don't seem to realize is that gossip can be hurtful, it can make a mess of an amicable situation, and it can prompt unnecessary drama. On a personal level, this has prompted all sorts of feelings in me, mainly a certain bitterness towards humanity, I've come to realize. For some reason I'm having a hard time letting this go. Perhaps I'm too emotional. Perhaps I do care too much what people think. Perhaps it is just that I do want to keep this divorce as smooth and kind as possible for him and for me. Or perhaps it's just because I feel like I need to justify my actions now. 

I don't think I need to justify myself to anyone. My life is my life. But it's a difficult thing somehow to wrap our heads around. It's not fun to have our integrity challenged, especially when we do the best that we can in any given situation. I feel as if this is a topic plenty of people can relate to--just as with my last topic of having our sense of self challenged; very similar topics, I must admit. 

There is a part of me that just wanted to believe that people would keep their noses aptly where they belong. There is a part of me that hoped people would just, basically, be decent human beings. What is this human attachment to drama? What is this human need to gossip and place their own opinions wrongly into a situation they know nothing about? What is this human impulse to judge? What is this human addiction to see the most negative in someone else's situation? More importantly, what is this human mentality that makes people unable to be Happy for someone else? 

Instead of just looking at someone's situation and going, "oh, they look happy. Therefore I am happy for them," people have to look at it and go, "oh, it's a mask. What are they trying to prove to everyone? They must actually be unhappy and are just trying to hide it." 

I think it's a pretty large reflection of our society as a whole. How badly are we conditioned to be unhappy? How conditioned are we to be jealous, envious, and generally negative towards other people? Through plenty of personal experiences, and through plenty of hearing, watching, and learning about other people's experiences, I've come to learn that people generally are incapable of being happy for someone else's successes. We are not in competition with one another, and the sooner people can realize that, the sooner we will all get along. Not only that, but the sooner people can learn to actually be Happy for someone else's successes, then the more you welcome opportunities and success into your own life. 

There are happy people in the world. There are Good Things genuinely in people's lives. I have worked hard to make happiness a part of my life, to welcome good things, to experience joys, to learn, to grow, to make my life what I want it to be. So, yes, I say this with confidence: I love my life, I am Happy, I feel good about the future, and I am not just saying this to hide some inner dark corners of myself. I have learned to be a pretty open person--perhaps too open for my own good at times. I have learned to accept being human. I have learned to embrace my darkness instead of pretending it's not there. I have learned to be Happy, and I am still learning to deal with the flow of the storms that come in and out of life. But one thing you will not find me doing is being something I am not. I have nothing to prove to anyone but myself. I am not trying to convince anyone that I am happy. I am not trying to convince anyone that I made the right decisions in my life. I am not trying to convince anyone that I am in love again. These are things I genuinely feel, things in my life that I have worked hard at. You don't have to be happy for me, I don't need your validation; I merely wish that you could be happy enough in your own life instead of deflecting on other people. It makes me sad to see it, and I have seen it plenty of times (people deflecting their miseries onto other people). I have watched plenty of friends and people close to me affected by this negative mentality. It's a shame. And it's silly. People need to learn to be happy for one another, support one another. People need to learn to stop assuming things about others, because unless you've walked a lifetime in someone else's shoes then you simply cannot understand, and therefore certainly cannot judge. 

I say these things not to justify myself anymore, I say these things because I feel there needs to be a major shift in the human mentality. Fortunately, I am also surrounded by so many wonderfully, incredibly enlightened and conscious people; people that strive to actually be happy and good and positive. I understand we are all just human, we are just trying, learning, struggling, and striving for better. But that positive shift is so important. When you observe another person's life, do not assume, do not judge, do not gossip. 

Life isn't rainbows and butterflies all the time for anyone, but I choose to focus more of my attention on the joys and things that excite me and make me happy, instead of complaining and dwelling on the negative. That is why the picture of my life I paint is happy and good, because that is what I strive for every day, that is what I Choose my life to Be; and that is why, for the most part, I am genuinely blissfully happy. I recommend everyone strives and works towards the same, because the potential exists in all of us. 

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{life reflections} Changes + Decisions

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{life reflections}

 Weekly thoughts and rambles. A glimpse into my mind and world. 

Entries that I might jot down in my Happy Diary; the release of thoughts to flow uninhibited. Reflections from the soul. 

Reflections of life.  

I hope to leave you inspired. 

If you want to share your own reflections of the week please leave a link to your "life reflections" entry in the comments for all to find and see.

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Changes + Decisions

Big life changes are intimidating at the best of times. When such large changes occur it often feels as if they threaten to crumble the foundation on which we have spent so much time building a certain part of our lives. We feel the ripple all the way through other areas of our lives… disruptive, destructive, unbalanced. It's difficult to stay centred, grounded, humbly in line with the positive of our new big changes. However, just because things seem rocky on the surface doesn't mean a beautiful plan is not still at play. In fact, our worlds must often crumble so that we may rebuild new ones. This is a good thing. The threat to our balance may not make it feel so, but change is good; only our resistance to it is bad. 

Let me repeat that: Change Is Good! 

Change is especially good when it is through our own action, through following our own hearts, and through chasing our dreams. Going after what we truly desire can be positively frightful, because it does require big change, risk, and stepping out of our comfort zones. However, success is all dependent on You. If you want something, go after it; but don't go half way and then give up because it's too difficult. If you want something bad enough, it will most definitely be yours. Sometimes it may be easy, other times it may require blood and sweat and tears and a great deal of an emotional roller coaster, perseverance, and optimism to drag you out the other side. But it will be worth it, and you will be all the more proud for your efforts. 

When we can keep the end goal in sight, then the journey becomes more graceful. I'm not saying tears and frustration and sacrifice won't still be involved, but overall your feeling should be optimistic, happy, and hopeful. When we can maintain our focus this way, the struggle lessens; because we are able to see it as a challenge, a bump on our path to overcome, but something that we Know we will ultimately come out the other side from. Optimism and Positive Thinking become your best tools during these trials. 

Remember that no matter what dark hole you have been consumed by, there is still light in the world, there is still joy, there is still happiness; and they are all there waiting for you. There is always a way to climb back to the surface of any dark hole in your path. Always. Always. Such is the beauty of life.

Before Big Changes enter our lives there is, of course, the preceding (and rather daunting) Decision making-time. This period is often the hardest part, the part that requires the largest act of faith in ourselves, and the biggest leap. Such big choices and changes can make it is easy to get tangled up in the web of our incessant over-thinking minds. So what to do? First off, if you want a decision to be the Right Decision, then it is up to You to make it the right one. If you want happiness then it's up to you to find it and choose it. What I believe, and through personal experience, the Universe is bringing to us exactly what we need when we need it. The Universe has our best interests in mind when we set that positive intention. 

However, there are no simple choices or answers in life. Indecision can grind on our being for months at at time without resolve. In the end, all we can do is do our best to listen to and to trust in our Hearts, have the courage to do what we need for ourselves, and believe that the Universe has our best interest in mind. We should also always make the most of what's given to us, and manifest and believe in the most positive and beneficial outcome. Believe that everything will work out for the best; and that everything happens for a reason. Because it will, and it does! 

Every change we make should be because we are choosing to love and honour our own needs, well-being, and happiness. If you are constantly putting someone else in front of you, then you will never be happy. I believe this to be particularly true in personal relationships. I'm not saying a little sacrifice here and there can't be constructive for a relationship, but if just one of you is (or both of you are) constantly sacrificing your own needs, plans, and desires, then you are heading for a derailing. We can only sacrifice so much of ourselves and our lives before there's nothing left. We become drained, tired, resentful, frustrated, and ultimately lost as we struggle to feel in tune with our own needs and dreams. The relationship will stop being fulfilling, and then it is either destined to be miserable forever (unless of some miraculous breakthrough), or will end. It takes a great deal of honesty with yourself to see what is best for you (and all those involved). Through experience, it is one of the hardest decisions to make, because the fear of making the wrong decision is somehow more frightening than being miserable forever. 

It took me being brutally, brutally honest with myself to make my recent huge life change. It took six gruelling months of hoping, trying, and failing, and then doing it all over again. What finally broke the ice was a certain vow I made to myself. I look back at this with a little flutter in my heart towards the perfection of the Universe now that things are where they are. The vow I took was this…

I vow to be Happy. I vow to be Open and Honest with myself. I vow to find my Fire. I vow to Be Myself, Love My Self, and Respect Myself. I vow to actively participate in my own Happiness. I vow to be kind and gentle with myself. I vow to stop feeling badly or apologizing for being human, for not being okay, or for being my self. I vow to never allow someone else to take away my self-worth. I vow to get my spark back, to feel myself again, to get My Life back. 

I vow to have the courage to do what I need for myself; to be bold and take risks; to be strong and courageous. I vow to Let Go. I vow to release what no longer serves me. 

I vow to live my life for Me. I vow to live a fulfilling Life. 

I made these vows to myself at the beginning of May. What happened after was a spiral of events that led up to exactly what I had vowed that day. As soon as I made clear to myself, not only that I Wanted, but that I Deserved to Be Happy and have a great life, then things began to fall into place. It still blows my mind. The simple act of allowing ourselves to Be Worthy of Good. It will transform your life, it will supercharge you, it will draw to you what you need to make a decision and to change your life in the best possible, and most beneficial, way. 

So, my best advice if you're stuck between indecision? Trust your heart, and vow to yourself that you Deserve Good Things, Happiness, and Love. 

And how to handle the turbulence to follow any big change? Focus on the outcome, and remember that this too shall pass; you will come out the other side into a land of rainbows and butterflies. Remember to set Positive Intentions, keep your mind on your goals and desires; keep the canvas clear of negative thinking and filled with what you want your life to be.    

  

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☺ Reflections on the New Chapter of My Life ☺

There is no denying… this lovely blog is becoming consumed by the current circumstances of my own life. I feel as if that is okay though; after all, I am a writer that shares life lessons and experiences, so why would the experiences of my own life not be shared with you all in hopes to help you reach some "ah ha" moment in your own life? Or perhaps for me to selfishly explore and discover the inner workings of my own life and then sharing such with you. Win-win then? Okay, I'll go with that.  

The truth is that the end of my marriage and this new chapter of my life is clearly absorbing most of my current time. But I also want to blog. I want to blog about my experience. So, once more, why not?

{from my recent Vancouver adventure}

Reflections on the New Chapter of My Life. 

Change can be scary. The fear of Change, worse so, will hold us back.  

Life can be quirky and unexpected. In fact, just when we think we have our entire "life plan" figured out the curveball comes a swinging to redirect us. I thought I was going to live happily ever after with my husband. I thought he was "the one". We were high school sweethearts, got married at 22, and shared a good ten years together in which most of our relationship was quite blissful, if not incredibly arduous (partly because we were so young, mostly because there was a lot of personal turbulence that directly affected each our lives, particularly mine). 

Ending any relationship isn't easy, add the word "marriage" into that and it's even more uneasy, add the words "ten years" and you ignite a personal complex. The most difficult part of the decision, however, was that I wasn't leaving my partner because he was a bad person, in fact he is an absolutely amazing person and any woman would be lucky to have him. It was why it took me a gruelling six months of tug-o-war with my own mind and heart to finally make a decision. After all, I was leaving a man I had committed myself to, a man that I had loved deeply for years, a man that treated me well and a man who was enlightened, conscious, kind, and in so many ways very much like me in our personal beliefs. There was a point in which I wondered what was wrong with me to have fallen out of love with such a man. 

Compatibility. 

Being on different paths.

Being different people and wanting different things. 

Personal traumas and troubles in which we no longer supported one another.

These were all the real reasons I think my marriage fell apart, why I fell out of love, and why I needed to move on. His soul no longer resonated with my own and our interests changed. I will say again: it's hard leaving someone who is good to you; it will make you question the deepest parts of yourself. But the mistakes we made during our time together played their weight in the ending, and so did many other factors. Falling out of love with someone is a strange feeling. But I learned to respect myself, to be honest with myself, and to listen to my heart, which were all vital in my own well-being--and things that I had a hard time accepting for a long long time. People (including ourselves) change, and there is nothing we can do about that. People end up going down different roads, developing different interests, striving for different desires, and requiring different attributes and needs from our inner selves and the partners we are with. This moves us onto different frequencies that are no longer resonating with the inner most important parts of our beings. That is when change is required, when it is time to be honest with yourself and to see the truth. None of this means the person we were with was a bad person, and it doesn't mean "it's not you, it's me", it just means that our paths are heading in different directions. Accepting this truth opened my world and allowed the guilt to ease and my decision to be made with more confidence.

My point in all this, if there is any, is that I thought I was going to live happily ever after with my husband in our dream home with a happy little pig, puppy, and our two cats, with an extravagant food garden, and a lifetime of sprinkled fairy dust on top. Life throws us curves balls. What we thought we wanted may sometimes not be what we actually want, or, even more so, what we actually need. There is a moment in life where we feel like we are going against the current; this is a good sign and feeling to listen to. If you are constantly fighting against a current, then it is probably not in your best interest to pursue. This was the case with my marriage. It felt as if I was constantly fighting against a current. This feeling was what gave me my first wake-up call: when I realized my life wasn't what I wanted it to be. I also came to see that there were things that I wanted that my current circumstance could not provide me--not because of him, but because of myself. I realized I needed change. I realized I needed a different environment in order to grow and learn new things about myself and to enrich my life again; to, basically, continue my life journey in the truest resonance to my soul. My faith in the Universe contributes to my peace of mind in all this, because I do believe it is looking out for each of us, but I also believe that we have to actively participate in our lives as well for it to be good and rich and abundant in all areas. Actively participate, listen to your heart, trust the signs, and trust that whatever decision you make can be the right decision. 

I remember wishing someone could make the decision for me. I remember looking for signs from the Universe every day. It's easy to misinterpret outward signs, the real sign was actually in my heart, I was just in complete denial of this for a long time--a time I regret. If I had listened to my heart sooner, if I had been honest with myself sooner, than perhaps this ending would have been easier. But, everything happens for a reason. Better late than never. 

As terrifying and woeful as ending my marriage has been (there is nothing in the world that has ever made my heart hurt so badly), I am also excited for the future. I had given up on love, part of me didn't believe it were possible; I mean, if my husband wasn't "the one", who else could be? Again, life can surprise you, and sometimes "the one" is actually right in front of you. Love is real. I really truly deeply believe and (dare I say) know this to be true. If we set the right intention, know that we are deserving, and remember to love ourselves, then we absolutely welcome the right person into our lives. 

Change can be scary. But change also opens us up to the world we deserve, the world we strive for, the world we are manifesting. Change is good; only our resistance to it is bad. Sometimes we just have to pull up the courage to do what we need for ourselves--and that often times requires the biggest leap of faith and making the hardest decisions. Through all this personal experience, I promise you, having the courage to listen to your heart is the most rewarding experience you will have--even if it is intimidating, even if it may seem devastating and difficult. Trust your heart. Trust that inner voice that is trying to guide you, trying to bring to you what you strive for, need, and desire. That little voice knows, because it resonates the deepest parts of your soul. So, learn to listen, and welcome goodness into your life. 

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{life reflections} Yoga and Healing

p.s. This was written on Thursday, for the date reference… not that it matters. ;)

As I sit here sipping on a rather blissful blueberry hemp smoothie on the deck of Sweet Cherubim, sweat still dripping down my spine, and hair still wet from the shower after my first Bikram Yoga class (think an intense 90 minutes of yoga in a 40 degree room), I can't help reflect on this immense shift in my life. To say that I have learned a lot about myself this past month would be a huge understatement. To say that I have entered an immensely healing period in my life with profound opportunity would also be highly under stated. Life itself is a healing journey, but to what I am referring is this new chapter of deep conscious healing I have recently begun, really tackling personal issues and past traumas to reach a better state of "enlightenment" and happiness in my life.  

These sorts of drastic life changes and challenges are not particularly new to me, but they always strike me all the same as incredibly profound, filled to the brim with lessons and opportunities to grow and discover new parts of myself. Through all my turmoils, I have definitely learned to embrace change, to seek the positive in any given situation. This process allows us to be more adaptable, allows us to grow and learn, allows the waves of turmoil to wash on by instead of getting stuck. 

Now, it's easy to dismiss things, to play things down when we start to compare our lives to others, or for an outsider looking in. Perhaps you are sat there thinking to yourself, but my life is incredibly difficult, for there is This and That going on, and This that needs to be done, and That which needs fixing, and This person is giving me grief. Well, this is no different than my world (or a lot of people's worlds), and I don't believe in making our current (or old) circumstances our excuses or clutches to negativity. At any given moment we have the opportunity to turn a situation into something that enriches our lives, to empower our beings, or we can allow it to cripple us. This is a basic, hard, blunt lesson I have learned through the tornado of my life. Attitude is everything. Having an Attitude of Gratitude is even more advantageous. 

I think--no, I know--that my attitude to any given situation has helped me through the negativity, through the bumps, through the sticky parts that weigh me down. I know that my gratitude has brought me more things to be thankful for, as well as deep, heart-warming gifts. The truth is, now that I sit here and reflect, that two of my happiest times in my life have also been during the most tumultuous. I don't mean like little bumps in the road, I mean a wrecking storm intent on destroying my inner and outer life; I mean absolute chaos; I mean the sorts of problems and challenges that bring you to tears and make you question why the Universe can be so cruel; I mean… you get the idea. However, through this emotional tornado, the brightest lights have shined. Perhaps it is because I look for things to be grateful for (Law of Attraction 101), or perhaps because I choose to see the positive, I therefore welcome the good to reenter my life. Good things come to me. Not because they land on my lap without effort, but because I choose to see them, embrace them, and challenge them to make me a better person. I actively participate in my happiness, in my life, and I encourage you to do the same with your own life--it is the only way you will grow and change for the better and create a place of happiness for yourself. 

So, yes, I am in a state of healing. I believe that was the point of today's "inspirational" post…  

Bikram Yoga

It amazes me that once we welcome healing into our lives how the opportunities are presented to us. Yesterday I was sat outside Sweet Cherubim (I just love Commercial Drive in Vancouver, and I love this little vegetarian/vegan place!), writing out a blog post, and a lovely gentleman complimented my tattoos and handed me a card for the Bikram Yoga studio directly above. The card was for a free yoga class. Ironically (actually, more like manifestation) I have been wanting to do a yoga class again for a while, and I have always been intrigued by hot yoga and have wanted to give it a try. The opportunity was perfect. So, the next day (today) I checked the schedule and headed over. I won't lie, I was slightly intimidated. Ninety minutes of intense yoga in a 40 degree room, sweating out toxins (you can burn a whopping 945 calories in this class!!). What I didn't expect (for some strange reason) was the healing that came from this class. There is something about being pushed to your limits, testing your perseverance, and enduring against the odds that will really teach you something about yourself. This class, this experience, was exactly what I needed in this healing journey I have been currently immersed in. I don't think I have ever sweated this much in my life. I don't think I have ever been tested this intensely to my physical and mental limits at the same time. There was a point I thought I might pass out, a point I thought I was going to puke, and a point I didn't think I could go on. If it hadn't been for the warm-hearted instructor at the beginning of the class telling me that these things were normal, I might not have endured. But, I pushed through, took a short breather, and jumped back in, pushing through the dizzy spills and nausea, focussing on breathing, and committing myself to the entire practice. Oh did it ever test me. But it was incredibly empowering, and incredibly rewarding. Feeling the blood circulate, the energy rushing, the toxins dripping out in sweat. Wow! It is a rewarding feeling when you push through something so challenging and feel rejuvenated afterwards. I'm not sure I can quite describe the feeling, but it was certainly healing, and profoundly rewarding. Mind over matter is a powerful thing, and a tool that can take us many places in life when we don't think we can endure. It proves we can do anything, proves we can push through anything. We all have that power within us. 

We all have the power to heal. We all have that power embedded into our DNA, embedded into our bodies, embedded into our minds; we just require the courage and perseverance to do so. But we should never underestimate our inner power. Ever. I encourage you to find yours, to follow it passionately, and to welcome the healing into your life. It may be a rough road, it may challenge you, but the end result is worth it all, and it will make you that much stronger, and that much more prepared for the next challenge in your life.

As always, so much love to you all!  

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☺ Where'd the Posts Go?! *Update!* ☺

The ReLove Plan.et blogs have been sorely neglected, this I apologize for. Sorry, and not sorry; not out of being self-important, but out of the feeling that apologies aren't required for many things in life in which we feel the need to apologize for--but I'll get to that in another post as I am already getting off topic (that was fast!). 

Where did I go? Why so quiet? Where are the positive posts and other fun stuff you're used to seeing here? 

Well. My life sort of fell on its head the last couple of weeks (yes, apparently my life has a head). Actually, when being honest, my life sort of fell on its head a couple of years back, or at least that's when the spiral commenced. Long story short, my husband and I are separating. Before you break out the box of tissues and the sad violin, a couple of things I'd like to note on this…  

1. I am not looking for sympathy; nor do I feel this is a place where people need to say "sorry to hear that" which seems to be the most common response to people finding out. 

2. This is a Good thing. While my partner is an amazing individual and I am not leaving him out of anything against his person (he really is an amazing person with so much to offer the world and others), the decision was based off a need for myself and my own (and I do believe his) personal growth and journey. We grew apart. By association, our relationship became neglected and I fell out of love. Simple as that. Which is not so simple, but that's it described in its most basic form, without all the details and mess and emotions and road that led to all of this. I will always love and care about my husband, but our lives were taking separate paths and we were perhaps not as compatible as we had thought to be. People change. Life Changes. It was time for me to be honest with myself (which was gruellingly difficult) and to listen to my heart (which I shut out for so long). While emotions are understandably running high and flailing about, I do feel positive about this decision. It was time for me to rediscover a piece of myself that I lost. And I do feel that I am already rediscovering and exploring these sides of myself. 

Okay, so that being said, the blog, and my work for that matter, are being neglected. Not because I don't want to blog--in fact I feel incredibly inspired through all of this to write, write, write--but because life is changing and complicated right now. I am in the process of moving out, packing, and manifesting my perfect little bungalow. My life is changing immensely. IMMENSELY! I have spent the past ten years with my husband, from the time I was seventeen and still in high school, and so the world is a brand new canvas for me to paint, rediscover and uncover other parts of my soul. 

I am excited. I am enthusiastic. I am positive. And I am guilty as hell for feeling those things, but learning to allow myself to be happy and To feel those positive emotions. I would love to (and will very soon) write a more in-depth post about Allowing Ourselves to Be Happy (in the face of other misery), because through this experience it has been one of the biggest challenges and blocks I have discovered about myself that I have held onto since I was a child; and has been one of the greatest obstacles to moving forwards. 

Sometimes we hold on to guilt as if it will make the other person feel better. It doesn't. Guilt only serves to burn you. And letting go is one of the most rewarding and healing lessons to any hardships we face in life, and especially so in our relationships. 

Life can be strange. Unexpected. But it is also beautiful. I am and always will be a huge believer that everything happens for a reason and that everything falls into place in the end. I know this to be truth through my own experience. I can see the magic still glowing around me and it is certainly inspiring. And so, I invite you to continue this journey with me, as I enter a new chapter of my life and while I share my experiences and lessons in hopes they may serve you or awaken a part of yourself that also may be dormant (as it has in me). We are all here to learn from one another, and I can't say how fortunate I feel to be sharing my journey with so many of you who appreciate my posts. It means the world to me. Thank you.  

If you found this article to be helpful, please consider a small donation or visit the shop. Thank you for your love and support.

{life reflections}

. . . . . . . . . . 

{life reflections}

 Weekly thoughts and rambles. A glimpse into my mind and world. 

These are entries that I might jot down in my Happy Diary; what happens when we put our fingers to the keyboard and allow our thoughts to flow uninhibited. Reflections from the soul. 

Reflections of life.  

I hope to leave you inspired. 

If you want to share your own reflections of the week please leave a link to your "life reflections" entry in the comments for all to find and see.

. . . . . . . . . .

Happy-get-on-track week is going well, I am happy to say! (harhar) I know last week's post may have been a bit of a downer, but as I always say, life is just like that sometimes. Regardless, I am feeling myself again. Sometimes getting back on track truly is only as hard as we make it. 

I've written up a post before on all the things I did originally to get back on track so I'm not going to repeat it all now. However, remembering that Happiness is in my own hands was one of the most helpful things for me this week. When you're in a slump it's easy to stay there because we often wake up feeling not so upidy-awesome and because we don't fix that right when we wake up, the spiral happens. I want to write a full "list" this week of more useful tips, since these "life reflections" posts aren't generally supposed to take over my "Inspirational" posts with all the life advice and help. So, let's just say that I'm back on track, that I forced myself to smile every single day. I'd wake up in the morning, telling myself "I love my life" with a great big silly grin, and start saying in my head all the things that I am grateful for as I entered my morning. I swear to you, this alone helps tremendously. Tremendously!!! 

That aside, I am so very grateful for the amazing friends and family I have in my life. I feel so blessed and loved and grateful. And I can't tell you how much I appreciated how many of you wrote me as well wishing me better and if that I needed anything you were there for me. So truly truly touched and grateful to you amazing wonderful lovely friends! I love you! And I think it goes without saying that I am always here for you too if ever you need me. xoxo

On Saturday I got to celebrate my good friend's birthday and housewarming, it was an epic night filled with so much ridiculousness and laughs and memories. I haven't actually drank since New Year's Eve, so it was fun getting even sillier and louder than I usually am. ;) We also tried to watch the meteor shower on Monday with a few friends while we had a bonfire, but the moon was so bright we didn't see any (and I'm sure staring at the fire instead of the sky didn't help either).

So blessed for my friends. I honestly don't have many in real life. I just don't really see the point in having a bazillion friends that you're not even close with just for a popularity contest. This isn't high school anymore. That's what I see a lot in this small town anyway, and I'm sure it's the same elsewhere. I don't get it. Why not put the time and effort instead towards working on the close relationships you do have instead of spreading yourself too thin? I just see so many of the artificial friendships of these big groups of insecure people that cling together and feed their own insecurities by talking badly about one another behind each other's backs. How is that helpful? How is that real friendship? True friends are there for each other, support one another, lift each other up when they're down. They don't Kick them down! 

So, anyways, I don't have that many friends in real life. I want Real friendships with people I actually have things in common with and have fun with and who support and love me as I do them. I know lots of fun people that I'll hang out at parties with but that's as far as many of them go. I love my close friends. So incredibly much. I love getting the hugs and seeing their smiles, and laughing and adventuring, and going for tea. In case this isn't obvious either, I don't go out partying much. It's not that I don't enjoy it, but I do understand the effect of not only the alcohol, but even going sober with all the staying up late totally messing up sleep patterns and therefor your head and health. Going out tooooo often also exhausts yourself, and where's the fun in that? Maybe it's also because, while it's fun to flail around and be ridiculously silly, I appreciate more of the sober times where you get quality time with the people you enjoy being around and sometimes drinking just feels like the artificial side of things. Again, not that I don't enjoy a good fun flailing night. Hopefully you understand what I mean. Don't get me wrong, I Do go out, and I Do have a ton of fun, I guess I've just sort of learned a bit of balance with that aspect of my life. I never used to party in high school, because I was a loner, I just didn't have much in common with a lot of people there and I really didn't know myself at all so not really a surprise. For the younger readers still in high school, I just want to let you know that life after high school gets better. Immensely better. I hated high school. I love life now. It's liberating and frightening, because when you leave school all of a sudden you're free to form your own opinions and hobbies and interests, where as in school it's very bootcamp and narrow minded--in my humble opinion. So yes, things get better. 

And, yes, I am alllll over the place today. I swear I'm not drinking right now. ;) 

How shall I finish this diary entry?…  

Life is good! Life is grand! Life is Beautiful! Have you noticed everything blossoming?!!! So super exciting. The air smells so sweet with flowers and fresh rain and grass, and everything is so green and vibrant and coming alive. I love spring! It truly truly is such a cleansing season, taking out the old and making room for the new, which is why we have the extreme ups and downs at the moment, so just know that you are heading towards somewhere better. So stay positive. Always stay positive. 

If you found this article to be helpful, please consider a small donation or visit the shop. Thank you for your love and support.

{life reflections}

. . . . . . . . . . 

{life reflections}

 Weekly thoughts and rambles. A glimpse into my mind and world. 

These are entries that I might jot down in my Happy Diary; what happens when we put our fingers to the keyboard and allow our thoughts to flow uninhibited. Reflections from the soul. 

Reflections of life.  

I hope to leave you inspired. 

If you want to share your own reflections of the week please leave a link to your "life reflections" entry in the comments.

. . . . . . . . . .

You won't appreciate the sun without the rain. In this moment the outside world is doing both. On the emotional level of life perhaps it's always doing both. I mean think about it for a moment. In a single day we can experience such ups and downs in a matter of seconds apart. As if to remind us to breathe, to take a look around, to see that the world around us is a roller coaster of emotions and events and people all spinning around us at unpredictable speeds. It is true though. We can't appreciate the sun without a little rain. Getting stuck in the mud is the problem. Even though we can still look up to the skies and smile when the rays of sunshine do come along, inevitably we're still stuck in the mud. However getting out of the mud at our feet is as simple as taking one step. And then another. And another. Until the mud has dried from our feet and we can feel the warmth of the sun resonate through every fibre of our being. 

Have I lost you? I think I lost myself a little. But isn't that also part of life? Finding and rediscovering ourselves? ;)

Anyways. You can't have the good without a little sprinkle of bad. But we must keep moving and let the rolling ventures of our lives continue on, leading us to new heights and emotions and experiences. Such is life. Beautiful wonder-filled life. 

We must learn to become bendy. Yes, bendy. To life that is… although flexibility is also great for your body. ;) Adaptability to what life hands you, learning to go with the flow, to not resist, to welcome good things into your life and releasing the bad. To focus on the good. Always seeing and seeking the positive in any experience. And to love yourself. These are keys to life. The keys that will make all the other lessons easier to learn and all the tribulations easier to overcome. 

The road can be bumpy and applying these lessons may take time, but they should always be there for you to turn to, like a cheat sheet of life. What a wonderful cheat sheet. I wish they taught us things like this in school. Can you imagine what sort of brilliant world we would live in if they did?

[Anna Hrachovec]

Anyways. I'm like anyone, experiencing the ups and downs of life, applying the lessons, moving forward. I'm no superhuman. I fall down. Sometimes it's just a trip. Sometimes I fall down and stay down for a while wallowing in the cycle of self pity until I choose to pull myself out. Because it's always a choice. But despite the downward spirals there is something that is always reassuring to me. Simply look at how far you've come. This is what I do. I was a suicidal, self-harming, depressed girl for a long time. Today, even with the lows of life, I am strong and positive and always find a way to climb back up. You just have to be willing to put yourself into a positive place, to push your way out of the dark tunnels. You have to be willing to accept that you Deserve good in your life. And you have to be willing to make it happen. It's so much easier to wallow in self pity because it's practically been taught to us through insecure society and life. It takes work and determination to wake up in the morning and say "Today is going to be awesome!" and then go out and keep that mentality. But practice makes perfect and, by golly, is it ever worth giving yourself daily pep talks to reach a state of bliss and happiness. Abolishing words like "I can't" or telling yourself that a particular kind of life isn't possible for you. It's bullshit talk, that's what it is. It's self-defeating, self-pitying attitudes that will get you no where. You have a choice, every single second of every single day and I want you to stop putting yourself down. Because you deserve and CAN stand up and be awesome and blissfully happy. You can, you can, you can. Oh yes you can. So go do it. Now.  

If you found this article to be helpful, please consider a small donation or visit the shop. Thank you for your love and support.

{life reflections}

. . . . . . . . . . 

{life reflections}

 Weekly thoughts and rambles. A glimpse into my mind and world. 

These are entries that I might jot down in my Happy Diary; what happens when we put our fingers to the keyboard and allow our thoughts to flow uninhibited. Reflections from the soul. 

Reflections of life.  

I hope to leave you inspired. 

If you want to share your own reflections of the week please leave a link to your "life reflections" entry in the comments for all to find and see.

. . . . . . . . . .

The sun is shining, the weather is warming up, and I've had a rather social week. Life feels good. 

It's interesting though, the ups and downs, the struggles, the rush of emotions, and the releases and surprises. Life is unpredictable, that is for sure. But it's a good thing. 

I'm trying to remind myself (and others) that life is a constant wave, but, no matter where you are, you can benefit from your position. Life puts you where you need to be in order to learn something, to increase your personal growth. It's just that we don't always see that, and when we fail to see that we tend to fall into negative habits and emotions and miss the lessons altogether. Then the spiral can happen which we get stuck in until we finally stand up and say "no!" But we can't walk away from what life is trying to teach us until we learn the lesson, otherwise we may feel as if we're getting ahead only to end up back in that same situation or place in life over and over again. It repeats until we can learn what we were meant to learn. Sometimes the lessons are concealed, sometimes they're subtle, and sometimes we really have to dig deep to get there, but the lesson is always there, one way or another. Or multiple ways. We can learn so much from a single experience or a single ordeal in our lives. Again, we just have to choose to see this. Life is all about attitude, or at least the state and condition of your Self within that life is all about attitude. It's a lesson that I still practice, that still takes work, and that can still be improved upon, but it is one solid message I remind myself of and carry with me at all times. It's the light switch that tells me everything is going to be alright, that I have a Choice in the way my life is going to be (in the future and, more importantly, in this very moment). It's all about my own attitude. I can choose to be Happy or I can choose to be sad. My choice. No one else's. Not life's circumstances or troubles can change that, attitude is up to me alone. And our lives then reflect whatever attitude we choose to pick up. That is why attitude is so important, why staying positive is so important, why reminding yourself to see the lessons and to smile in the face of troubles is so important. Why "I can't" or "that's impossible" are not words that should be in your vocabulary. Attitude will shape your life. 

I get it though, it's easy to get discouraged, especially if you feel stuck in one spot, in one lesson that you just can't get past. But discouragement and feeling frustrated are not beneficial emotions. It's important to remember that life is beautiful at all times when our eyes are open to it, and it's also important to remember that nothing is permanent. We can't get too attached to feeling down, but it's just as important not to get too attached to feeling too high either. Happiness is a state of being. We may experience extreme highs, but if we get attached to that high then we feel disappointed at the downward swings. Hold everything with passing release. Go with the flow. Everything in life changes, nothing is permanent. And there's beauty and comfort in that, again, if we so choose to see it. 

What am I trying to say? Life is beautiful! Your Attitude will make it so. Don't get discouraged ever ever. Stay Positive. And remember that life is a journey not a destination, so learn to enjoy the ride, to go with the flow, and to laugh and smile all day long. 

If you found this article to be helpful, please consider a small donation or visit the shop. Thank you for your love and support.

{life reflections}

. . . . . . . . . . 

{life reflections}

 Weekly thoughts and rambles. A glimpse into my mind and world. 

These are entries that I might jot down in my Happy Diary; what happens when we put our fingers to the keyboard and allow our thoughts to flow uninhibited. Reflections from the soul. 

Reflections of life.  

I hope to leave you inspired. 

If you want to share your own reflections of the week please leave a link to your "life reflections" entry in the comments for all to find and see.

. . . . . . . . . .

It's an incredibly beautiful day here today in Nelson, B.C.. The sun is shining, the lake is twinkling, and I'm sitting here in my sunroom in a t-shirt and no socks (I love not wearing socks) without having to turn the heat on. Hurrah for spring!

It's been a rather busy week this one. Orders from ReLove's etsy shop have kept me super busy, as well as getting orders together for a few stores (exciting!). Oh! And ReLove Plan.et is in Ripping Giraffe's window display here in town too. Woot! 

When I haven't been creating, I've been fortunate to have some lovely adventures as well. Tea dates are regular outings for me, it's time I get to spend with one of my best friends, catch up, talk about life, smile, laugh, and enjoy some girl time (and tea and raw treats of course). I also got to go to the hot springs this week with a couple girlfriends, and "Prince Vanilla" the lovely unicorn my friend's car dash (see yesterday's "this moment" post ;)). There were a few scattered moments bumping into friends I haven't seen in a while as well which are always nice. I also drove out with my hubby and one of our guy friends (who was kind enough to help us out with his truck) to my dad's garden centre (Dig at the junction) to pick up soil and manure for our garden beds. It was nice going out to see my dad. Our relationship has been estranged for a few reasons, all that have since passed and been resolved I feel. It's still difficult to trust again when your hearts been trampled over for so many years, but I don't have a place in my heart to dwell on that anymore. Letting him back into my life has been a gradual progression. I feel good about where things are now and look forward to things getting even better. 

Life is a funny thing that way. If you would have asked me a year and a half ago if my family life would be where it is at today I probably would have laughed at you. But I understand the power of staying positive, of manifesting and attracting your desires and dreams to you through the Law of Attraction. I talk about the Law of Attraction a lot because, from experience, I know that it undoubtedly works. Whenever it doesn't work I don't get discouraged, I simply accept that I'm not ready for whatever it is I'm asking for or I may not be manifesting right. It can be hard to do, especially at the beginning. There are so many tricks and techniques, things to do and not to do, being in the right mindset and frequency--all of which I try to talk about and share on the blog. But I have seen some unimaginable miracles happen because of it, which is why I will continue to place such an emphasis on this Universal Law here at ReLove Plan.et. 

Anyways. I am happy to have a relationship with my dad again. Any and every relationship is healable if the circumstances are right and if both people change. Bottom line, I'm rather happy with my family life and relationships at the moment. Oh, and our visit to the garden centre was nice too. I even got a new cactus friend for my room, which will be my little gift from my dad to cherish. :)

Yesterday we built our first garden bed. We're getting to start from scratch on our garden this year, which may be more work but is also pretty rewarding and will mean less work (weeding and such) once veggies start to grow. It was a fun and silly day. Cory (my husband) took a permaculture course a few years back and so he sort of knows the ropes (or some) of gardening. At least more than I know. I know nothing. He's teaching me and it's a lot of fun and quite amazing to see what nature can do. I think I'm going to start a progress post on the blog for our garden, sharing some pictures and what we've been up to with the garden since I feel it's such a valuable thing that everyone should be doing for themselves, whether it be a large garden or a tiny window box. Anything helps. Especially living in the world we live in today where vegetables are more expensive to buy than cheap garbage junk food that will only make you sick. Call me crazy but it seems counter-productive to "save money" on cheap food when you're going to end up paying far more on medical bills and feeling like the garbage you're eating. But that's just me. ;) I don't have a hard time justifying buying local organic produce. I like cooking (I used to hate it and never be motivated to), knowing what's Actually in your food, and reaping the benefits of Healthy food so that you Feel Good. Isn't that what life's about after all? Feeling Good!? 

Holy ramble batwoman! 

Yesterday was International Women's Day! (yes I have to throw this in here too) Women have come so far! We still have a long ways to go, but I feel like our progress is coming quickly. I know so many amazing women in my life. People often think of famous women when they think of inspiring women, but the truth is most of what I've learned is from the women directly in my life. My mother is such an amazing woman who has taught me so much. She deserves a shout out. She did what so many women struggle to do and got out of two abusive relationships, got out on her own, and loved her children so much. She taught me about love, health, listening and talking, communicating, honesty, friendship, about life. She is truly amazing. My sister is also amazing and I am so proud of all that she does and continues to do. She has two of the sweetest little girls and I know they are going to turn out as kick-ass as she is. She just started a blog and is already doing so many amazing things with it. She lives as self-sustaining as possible and is an awesome earth-conscious mama and supportive sister. You should check out her blog here: {LittleMountainHaven} and see her amazing garden and homesteading and my adorable nieces. ;) I've seen and known plenty of other amazing women, like friends that do amazing things. Even if the things we do sometimes seem small, there is no truly small amazing act. Truth is, women are freakin-fantastic and we don't get enough credit for this. So shine on you amazing women and learn to appreciate how truly amazing you are!!

Holy molly ramble batwoman! 

Okay, I shall close this ramble by saying how much I truly love and appreciate all of you who read this blog, who support my etsy store and all of my work, and for all the many amazing people I've met via Facebook and social networking. There are so many amazing wonderful people out there and I feel so blessed to know you all. 

I hope you're life is grand and you are learning to appreciate all the beautiful little and large moments. Much Love! 

If you found this article to be helpful, please consider a small donation or visit the shop. Thank you for your love and support.