Friday, September 21, 2012

☆ Witty Responses to the "Too Bad" you're Vegan remarks ☆

I feel like this article has been a long time coming and you'll have to excuse my extreme sarcasm here, but, after all, what is life without some humour? ;)

When people go vegan or vegetarian, I've noticed (and remember going through the same thing myself) people have the most close-minded ignorant attitudes possible. 
Now, I'm trying to imagine why people do this… is it from guilt that they still eat meat and/or dairy? Is it a self-defence mechanism? Usually when people attack others it is from insecurity so I am leaning towards these theories. Perhaps the most obvious reason; their beliefs are being challenged and no one likes to have their beliefs challenged… which can then lead to those ignorant and/or close-minded remarks. *Sigh*

Let's take a look at the most common:
Oh, sorry to hear that… I feel sorry for you… Too bad. 
It's unhealthy. 
But what about your protein and your calcium and and…
… I love meat and dairy too much…
We're meant to eat meat. 

Generally, a lot of shitty vibes. So, what's a veg gal or guy to do? Get feisty! 
I mean this in the best possible way and generally I am all for the most positive, kind, and loving attitude in any negative situation, however, when push comes to shove, there comes a time when you have to shut the ignorance up, which brought me to writing this post…  
Time to debunk and slap across the face those ignorant bastards! ;) Just joking, well about the "bastards" part, but I would like to give you fellow vegans and veg-heads something to turn to when the battle gets rough out there. Hell, you can even just direct them right to this article. *Waves* Hi meat-eaters! ;)

*disclaimer: I don't have anything against meat-eaters. My husband still eats meat from time to time and I have friends that do too. The following snarky remarks are aimed at those that push and shove and really get under them veg nerves in terms of close-minded ignorant remarks. Okay… I think that's all I needed to say, let's get on with it… 

The response to…

The "Too Bad" mentality
Oh nooooo! God forbid should I have to eat something this amazing:

 Or This amazing! 

Or all of this other amazzzzzing food!

Wow, you'd better feel super sorry for me! I don't know how I will go on without animal cruelty-filled products anymore. 
If you think for one second that being vegan means I am deprived of amazing food then think again. I Love food, my friends love everything I make, I love vegan restaurants. I love vegan food!!! It tastes damn good and even my non-veg friends love the food I make. So stop being so… what's the word I'm looking for? Stupid? Okay!
Now drool all over all this other amazing vegan food:

"It's Unhealthy"
Are you f*#king kidding me? Do you honestly have ANY IDEA what in the world you're talking about? Oh, yeah, please don't let me become unhealthy on a vegan diet, I might end up looking like this at 70 years old! 

The truth is that most people eat like crap. Most vegetarians and vegans are generally also moving towards a healthy lifestyle so choose better food choices as well as the pure healthy goodness of a non-animal product diet. But tell me, how many meat-eaters do you know actually eat enough fruit and vegetables? How many of them eat junk food? How many of them actually enjoy their food or do they thoughtlessly wolf it down? How many of them actually have energy for that matter?
Going vegan can clear up your skin, give you more energy, and make you feel fabulous in every way possible. So yeah, please don't worry where I'm getting my protein or calcium. But them meat-eaters might want to start watching how much protein they are eating since there are actual health problems related to consuming too much (which most North Americans do!) and not too little. 
Just about any dietitian or research you can find will also tell you that there is a strong link between the consumption of meat and diseases.
As for the dairy argument. Well, this short article better explains all of that: 9 Reasons Why Milk Sucks!

If you want to be Buff you have to eat meat!
You sure about that? I introduce to you... Germany's strongest man! Yes, he's vegan, and there are many more that are body builders and athletes. Now can we please stop having to argue the whole muscle debate?

"I love meat and dairy too much." 
Hmmm. K, I'm going to be super duper blunt here, forgive me…
Are you that self-absorbed? Do you have that little will-power? Or are you that content to turn a blind eye? Do you have ANY idea what goes on in factory farms? Do you have any idea the years of torture that animal went through for that ten to twenty minutes of your taste-bud pleasure? Do you have any idea what kind of crap is added to most meat and dairy before it even reaches you? How about that morphine in your cheese? Yum…

Do you have any idea how amazing vegan food actually is? Of course not because it's not widely available in most restaurants and stores. But it's damn amazing and if the world was vegan, if vegan was the "norm" instead of the SAD North American diet, then I tell you no one would miss meat or dairy. No One. 

"Mmm, bacon." 

enough said.

"If you were stuck on a dessert island... "

"We're meant to eat meat."
Actually we're not. Our bodies don't produce the correct enzymes to properly digest meat so it ends up rotting away in your intestines for years. Our intestines are too long, cholesterol affects us, and we don't have claws or teeth. No, our canines do NOT make us worthy of ripping our teeth into animal flesh, have you taken a real look at the canines of carnivores? Cuz you wouldn't still point out your canines if you did.

To elaborate and dive into greater details, Dr. Milton R. Mills. wrote a paper called, "The Comparative Anatomy of Eating," which breaks down our body organ by organ and shows why the body of humans is better equipped for a vegetarian diet (some points I briefly mentioned above). He compares our organs to Carnivores, Herbivores, and Omnivores and shows us which we are most like. For those curious here it is:
Also, meat is no longer a necessity. There may have been a time when us scavenging humans lived in caves and ate meat, but we absolutely do not need to eat meat anymore. So why would we subject animals to needless horrid suffering when we don't have to? 

"It doesn't make a difference"
Hell ya it does! One of the biggest ways people show their support is with their money. Choosing not to buy animal products means I'm not Funding it! Plus vegans save nearly 200 animals per year. So yeah… 

It's so wrong to eat Horse Meat...
I get tired of hearing people say that it's wrong to eat a horse but not a cow. Or that it's wrong to eat a dog but not a pig. They're all animals. They're all the same living creatures with emotions and beating hearts and souls.
Or the people that say hunting is wrong, but they still eat meat. What, so because you yourself didn't physically Kill the animal then it makes it okay? As if this somehow removes meat-eaters from the responsibility of taking that animal's life? You are still killing animals if you are eating them, at least hunters aren't raising animals in suffering just to brutally kill them.
**I'm not for hunting either, but if you're going to eat meat then you'd better be able to kill the animal yourself--it's better than factory farms**

The "Animals don't have souls" remark.
Really? For real? You can consume meat from a factory where animals experience unimaginable cruelty and pretend that it doesn't happen, completely disassociate that it even was an animal… you can watch "Earthlings" and still eat meat and dairy… or maybe you refuse to even look into what actually goes on on factory farms… and you're telling me Animals are the ones without a soul? … Okayyyy?…
Did you know that cows cry when their babies are ripped away from them? Did you know that animals heading for slaughter know what is about to happen to them and freak out?! Did you know pigs are smarter than your three-year-old child and your dog? Have you ever watched an animal ever in your life? Ever?! 

"Oh, you're vegan, so you CAN'T have that"
Actually, I CAN, I'm just CHOOSING not to. Myself and other vegans are making an Ethical Choice not to consume dairy, eggs, meat, and other animals products, it has nothing to do with not being able to.
We are not deprived and we are not sad about this choice.
I like the response of "I'm choosing not to" versus telling people you "can't eat that because I'm vegan" wording, because it really is a choice and telling people you are Choosing versus Can't shows others that you are not deprived or unhappy about your decision. On the contrary, you are making an ethical choice to be vegan that you Feel Good and are confident about!

We're at the top of the food chain. 
What exactly makes us at the top of the food chain? Put just about any modern man in the middle of the wilderness and he is royally f#%ked! Put man back into the wilderness and we scavenge and though we may hunt, we also become the hunted. How is that the top of the food chain again? Oh, wait, what, because we evolved? We consciously destroy our environment, our home, you know the place we have to live. We still haven't figured out that we're not cows or goats yet. We poison ourselves, and know it, daily. And…  animals never had a war… (all I can picture is the Futurama moment, so enjoy below... ;))

And, hey, while we're here, what about your dog or cat? Do they have no souls either? Would you eat them? Would you drink their milk?

Argument closed. 

If you're a meat-eater, I hope perhaps your mind is a little more open. If you're a vegan or vegetarian, I hope that you are armed to face those ignorant remarks with truth and savvy. 
Have a lovely day! ;)


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  1. Nice! One correction though - our intestines are LONG like an herbivore, not short like a carnivore :)

    1. thanks for pointing that out! Fixed! silly me ;p


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