Saturday, April 27, 2013

{life reflections}

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{life reflections}
 Weekly thoughts and rambles. A glimpse into my mind and world. 
These are entries that I might jot down in my Happy Diary; what happens when we put our fingers to the keyboard and allow our thoughts to flow uninhibited. Reflections from the soul. 
Reflections of life.  

I hope to leave you inspired. 
If you want to share your own reflections of the week please leave a link to your "life reflections" entry in the comments for all to find and see.
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Happy-get-on-track week is going well, I am happy to say! (harhar) I know last week's post may have been a bit of a downer, but as I always say, life is just like that sometimes. Regardless, I am feeling myself again. Sometimes getting back on track truly is only as hard as we make it. 
I've written up a post before on all the things I did originally to get back on track so I'm not going to repeat it all now. However, remembering that Happiness is in my own hands was one of the most helpful things for me this week. When you're in a slump it's easy to stay there because we often wake up feeling not so upidy-awesome and because we don't fix that right when we wake up, the spiral happens. I want to write a full "list" this week of more useful tips, since these "life reflections" posts aren't generally supposed to take over my "Inspirational" posts with all the life advice and help. So, let's just say that I'm back on track, that I forced myself to smile every single day. I'd wake up in the morning, telling myself "I love my life" with a great big silly grin, and start saying in my head all the things that I am grateful for as I entered my morning. I swear to you, this alone helps tremendously. Tremendously!!! 
That aside, I am so very grateful for the amazing friends and family I have in my life. I feel so blessed and loved and grateful. And I can't tell you how much I appreciated how many of you wrote me as well wishing me better and if that I needed anything you were there for me. So truly truly touched and grateful to you amazing wonderful lovely friends! I love you! And I think it goes without saying that I am always here for you too if ever you need me. xoxo
On Saturday I got to celebrate my good friend's birthday and housewarming, it was an epic night filled with so much ridiculousness and laughs and memories. I haven't actually drank since New Year's Eve, so it was fun getting even sillier and louder than I usually am. ;) We also tried to watch the meteor shower on Monday with a few friends while we had a bonfire, but the moon was so bright we didn't see any (and I'm sure staring at the fire instead of the sky didn't help either).
So blessed for my friends. I honestly don't have many in real life. I just don't really see the point in having a bazillion friends that you're not even close with just for a popularity contest. This isn't high school anymore. That's what I see a lot in this small town anyway, and I'm sure it's the same elsewhere. I don't get it. Why not put the time and effort instead towards working on the close relationships you do have instead of spreading yourself too thin? I just see so many of the artificial friendships of these big groups of insecure people that cling together and feed their own insecurities by talking badly about one another behind each other's backs. How is that helpful? How is that real friendship? True friends are there for each other, support one another, lift each other up when they're down. They don't Kick them down! 
So, anyways, I don't have that many friends in real life. I want Real friendships with people I actually have things in common with and have fun with and who support and love me as I do them. I know lots of fun people that I'll hang out at parties with but that's as far as many of them go. I love my close friends. So incredibly much. I love getting the hugs and seeing their smiles, and laughing and adventuring, and going for tea. In case this isn't obvious either, I don't go out partying much. It's not that I don't enjoy it, but I do understand the effect of not only the alcohol, but even going sober with all the staying up late totally messing up sleep patterns and therefor your head and health. Going out tooooo often also exhausts yourself, and where's the fun in that? Maybe it's also because, while it's fun to flail around and be ridiculously silly, I appreciate more of the sober times where you get quality time with the people you enjoy being around and sometimes drinking just feels like the artificial side of things. Again, not that I don't enjoy a good fun flailing night. Hopefully you understand what I mean. Don't get me wrong, I Do go out, and I Do have a ton of fun, I guess I've just sort of learned a bit of balance with that aspect of my life. I never used to party in high school, because I was a loner, I just didn't have much in common with a lot of people there and I really didn't know myself at all so not really a surprise. For the younger readers still in high school, I just want to let you know that life after high school gets better. Immensely better. I hated high school. I love life now. It's liberating and frightening, because when you leave school all of a sudden you're free to form your own opinions and hobbies and interests, where as in school it's very bootcamp and narrow minded--in my humble opinion. So yes, things get better. 
And, yes, I am alllll over the place today. I swear I'm not drinking right now. ;) 

How shall I finish this diary entry?…  
Life is good! Life is grand! Life is Beautiful! Have you noticed everything blossoming?!!! So super exciting. The air smells so sweet with flowers and fresh rain and grass, and everything is so green and vibrant and coming alive. I love spring! It truly truly is such a cleansing season, taking out the old and making room for the new, which is why we have the extreme ups and downs at the moment, so just know that you are heading towards somewhere better. So stay positive. Always stay positive. 


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